


Catch Me A Catch

by giselleslash



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Magic, Merlin Big Bang Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-05
Updated: 2012-08-05
Packaged: 2017-11-11 11:27:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 32,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/478046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/giselleslash/pseuds/giselleslash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Modern AU, Merlin uses his magic to work as a magical matchmaker. Elena is a customer hoping to snag Arthur Pendragon but things don’t go exactly as planned. Gwaine is there to be Merlin's always helpful, nearly always shirtless, neighbor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Catch Me A Catch

**Author's Note:**

> Tons of love and thanks goes out to [winterstorrm](http://winterstorrm.livejournal.com/) for the wonderful Brit-pick, as well as [achelseabee](http://achelseabee.livejournal.com/) for the beta AND art, both of which are amazing in every possible way. I'm in awe of your work and it's been so amazing working and collaborating with you on this. Also, all the love in the world to my flist, who cheered me on and patiently listened to me whine/throw temper tantrums during the writing process.
> 
> Please check out Chelsea's art post [HERE](http://achelseabee.livejournal.com/1824.html) and give her copious amounts of love for her wonderfully gorgeous artwork.

  


Merlin tossed the torn envelope and piece of paper onto his kitchen table as he slumped down in his chair. Third notices for overdue bills were never a good thing.

He absently played with the empty mug sitting on the table amongst the detritus of his life. He was well past panic mode; bills were piling up, the previous and current month’s mortgage on his flat was due in a little less than three week’s time, and he was pretty sure that if things didn't change drastically he'd be moving in next door with Gwaine and his hair products and perpetual shirtlessness.

Not that Merlin minded the shirtlessness. When a man had the abs that Gwaine did it was a crime against nature to cover them up.

But Merlin had grown inordinately fond of his little flat. He'd spent far too many years sharing grotty flats with equally grotty flatmates and when he'd finally found his flat he'd fallen hopelessly in love with it. If it hadn't been completely bonkers, and had actually been legal, he'd have married his flat, he was that in love with it. But now? Well, he was nineteen days and one more red notice away from losing it completely.

The situation was dire.

He hadn’t had a client in over two weeks and there wasn’t even a whiff of one on the horizon. He was seriously contemplating making a sign and standing out on the street corner.

  
_Will Do Magic For Mortgage Payment.  
(even the iffy kind.)_   


Merlin wasn’t quite sure what, ‘the iffy kind,’ implied to people, but, whatever, he was desperate, and if someone wanted him to magic them up a long-term relationship with their cat-shaped pillow he was fully prepared to do it.

He’d always told himself he’d only use his magic to help along people’s happiness, to bring them together, and give them what they most wanted. He was Glinda the Good Witch for fuck’s sake. A little touch to the wrist of a certain someone and maybe, just maybe, there’d be a happily ever after in two people’s futures.

His mother had tsk’ed at him when he’d told her what he’d decided to do with his unusual gift. She wondered why he couldn’t do something sensible like be a doctor or a teacher. She’d said, _‘Merlin, can’t you just use your magic to whip up a batch of biscuits on the weekend without having to get up from the settee? Why must you matchmake of all things? Are you to sing and dance about it as well?’_

Apparently his mother was living under the assumption Merlin wanted to live his life in a production of _Fiddler on the Roof_.

But it wasn’t that at all. Merlin simply loved what his magic could do. He’d discovered when he was fourteen that he had a knack for bringing together lost souls. Well maybe ‘lost souls’ was too grand a term for someone managing to bring together his frumpy middle-aged art teacher and his equally frumpy middle-aged German teacher. She tended towards frowning and he was mostly bald, but still, she was slightly less frowny once the two of them started dating. Herr Williams was still mostly bald, that didn’t change, but Merlin considered it an accomplishment anyway. Plus, it got him out of his German exam, which was the real miracle of the whole ordeal.

Ever since that lucky happenstance he’d used his magic to, yes, make biscuits without getting up from the settee, but he also used it become a matchmaker. And he loved it, he genuinely loved it. He adored the fact that the wall next to his kitchen table was filled with pictures of happy, grinning couples, some even with babies or dogs, or in one interesting case, an assortment of reptiles (he wasn’t going to judge). All of them with notes scribbled on the back or in an accompanying card telling him how grateful they were to him, how he’d changed their lives and made them happier than they could ever have imagined.

What could be more wonderful than that?

What use was his magic if he didn’t use it for something so marvellous?

Gwaine always said the use for his magic was to magic him up a money tree, but that if Merlin was erroneously operating under the assumption it was to be used for the emotional well-being of others he’d, let him live in his fantasy world. He didn’t want to anger the lunatic.

But now? Two weeks without a job meant two weeks without any dosh coming in. Merlin was desperate for a client to come knocking on his door. And the thing was, he didn’t exactly advertise his services. He’d gained his clients by discreet word of mouth, and well, the longer he wasn’t working the longer people weren’t talking and passing on his name until pretty soon he feared no one would talk about him at all and then he’d be well and truly fucked.

He picked up his overdue bill again and stared at it, hoping and praying that something would come along to turn his entire life to rights because at this point, only a miracle would do.

~*~

Merlin was frying up some eggs and bacon the next morning when he heard his door open and close.

“You do know I didn’t give you a key so you could come waltzing in and out whenever you took a fancy,” Merlin called out.

“Door wasn’t locked,” Gwaine said as he walked in and took a seat at the kitchen table. “You really ought to be more careful, who the fuck knows what could wander right on in.”

Merlin rolled his eyes and took out another plate from the cupboard.

“Honestly, you’re like a dog. The minute I start cooking you’re over here with your tail wagging.”

“Yes, but I’m totally adorable and completely irresistible so there’s no use whinging about it. You know you love me.”

“That’s debatable,” Merlin said as he set a plate in front of Gwaine, who grinned up at him.

“I brought the paper. That’s something, right?”

“You mean the paper you stole from Mrs. Abermarle?”

“Possibly.”

“Gwaine! The woman is probably ninety years old and you’re stealing from her? Have you no shame at all?”

Gwaine shrugged. “I help her out when something’s gone tits up in her flat, and I do it without a shirt on. You should see the thrill the old bird gets out of it. A newspaper here and there and an unclogged kitchen sink ought to even things up.”

Merlin laughed. “I’m surprised you haven’t given her a heart attack with all your muscle-y manliness on display.”

Gwaine grinned at Merlin around a mouthful of eggs. “I know it sets your heart all aflutter.”

“Yes, I’m all a’swoon.”

“As you should be.”

“Shut it and eat your eggs and bacon.”

“What? No toast?”

“Dick,” Merlin muttered but laughed anyway when Gwaine waggled his eyebrows at him.

“Mm, before I forget,” Gwaine said as he wiped his mouth off and looked over at Merlin. “The shop’s looking for someone to work part-time at the till. Millie’s got an evening class and can’t work the last four hours of the day. I know it’s not much, but you’ve got nothing coming in right now and I thought any little bit helps, yeah?”

“Thanks, mate,” Merlin gave Gwaine as much of a grin as he could muster at the thought of the direness of his financial situation. “I appreciate it.”

Gwaine reached over and gave Merlin’s wrist a quick squeeze. “What’re best mates for?”

“Apparently to eat all your food,” Merlin said as he eyed Gwaine’s nearly empty plate.

“Oi,” Gwaine laughed. “I buy groceries to make up for it.”

“You buying me three carrots and a pot of yoghurt hardly counts as grocery shopping. What am I supposed to make with three carrots and a pot of yoghurt?”

“Something magically delicious?” Gwaine asked.

Merlin laughed and gave Gwaine a shove as he got up to get some orange juice. “Fuck off, you.”

Gwaine held up both hands. “Hey, it’s a compliment to your skills.”

“Uh huh,” Merlin hummed as pulled the orange juice out of the fridge. “Whatever you say.”

Merlin was on his way back to the table when his buzzer rang. He set the juice down in front of Gwaine, who proceeded to open it up and take a giant gulp straight from the carton, and walked to his intercom.

“Yeah, hello?” he said as he held down the speaker button.

“Um. Hi. Hello,” a female voice floated out of the intercom, sort of muffled and static-y. “Are you Merlin?”

“Yeah, that’s me.”

“Good. Excellent. I’m Elena.”

The voice paused and Merlin grinned to himself as he wondered how long it would take the woman on the other end to ask to be rung up.

“Hello, Elena.”

“Oh. Yes. Hello.” There was another pause. “Er, but I said that already, didn’t I? Damn.”

Merlin laughed. “Do you want to come up by any chance?”

“Yes!” the voice said happily. “I would love to come up.”

“Well, up you come then.” Merlin grinned as he held down the button long enough to unlock the front door. When he turned around to start quickly straightening up his lounge before Elena got up to his flat, he ran smack into Gwaine, who had been standing right behind him.

Merlin shook his head. “Food and women. Like a dog.”

Gwaine ignored him. “She sounded sexy, didn’t she? I bet she’s gorgeous. Can I wait and see?”

“She sounded _sweet_ ,” Merlin said. “And like a potential client so, no, you can’t wait and see her.”

“Come on, Merlin, be a mate.”

Merlin stopped picking up the papers and books scattered around his settee to give Gwaine a look. “You mean to tell me you don’t pull enough women on your own that you have to go sniffing around my clients based on a sexy voice?”

“I’m a romantic, Merlin. I never stop looking. Who knows, you could be denying me an introduction to my future soul mate.”

“If she’s a potential client I highly doubt she’s your future soul mate.”

“For a matchmaker you’re awfully curmudgeony.”

“I’d say I’m being realistic,” Merlin argued.

“No fun.”

“Whatever,” Merlin said as he shoved Gwaine towards the door. “Off you go.”

“See if I ever bring you carrots and yoghurt again,” Gwaine threatened.

“I promise that as I expire from starvation my dying thoughts will be of you and your carrots and yoghurt and all the wrongs I’ve done to you.”

“Well, as long as you promise.” Gwaine grinned at Merlin and opened the door, only to bump into the person standing on the other side of it.

“Oh. Oops. Sorry,” said the person, who could only be Elena, as she blushed and stepped back.

"No need to apologize." Gwaine smiled charmingly at her, making her blush even brighter. "Entirely my fault."

“Are you Merlin?” Elena asked in disbelief.

“No, he’s not,” Merlin said as he shoved Gwaine the rest of the way out the door and reached out to gently pull Elena inside. “I’m Merlin, and he was just leaving.”

“Gwaine, in case you were wondering.” Gwaine winked at Elena.

“She wasn’t,” Merlin said as he shut the door on Gwaine and turned to Elena. “Sorry about that. Nosy, annoying neighbor, you know how it is.”

Elena laughed but Merlin could tell she only did it because she didn’t know what else to do. It came out all awkward and forced.

“So, how can I help you?” Merlin asked. Best to cut to the chase. Usually his clients were embarrassed and nervous about asking him for his services so he always tried to get things going right away. If he waited too long it just gave them more time to think and more time to back out. Over the years he’d had a few runners, but he was usually able to make them feel comfortable enough to at least admit they wanted his help.

“Well.” Elena flushed red again as she clasped her hands and looked everywhere in the room except at Merlin. “I heard you can do things.”

Merlin smiled at the way Elena whispered the last bit.

“I can,” he said.

She must have caught the amusement in his voice because she stuttered out, “Oh, no! I don’t mean _do things_ , like _weird_ things, I just meant -. Damn. I’m mucking this all up, aren’t I?”

“You’re doing fine,” Merlin tried to reassure her but she ignored him and carried on.

“I’m absolute crap in situations like this. I never know the right things to say and then I say all the wrong things so I don’t even know why I try, I might as well just blurt it all out.”

“You could do that.” Merlin nodded. “Blurt it all out.”

Elena took a breath and said quickly, “I want you to use your magic to make Arthur Pendragon fall in love with me.”

“Well, that’s not really how it goes,” Merlin began, but Elena interrupted him.

“My father and Arthur’s father want us to get married but I just don’t think Arthur feels that way about me. We’ve always been mates, fantastic mates, actually, ever since we were kids, but our fathers want to merge our families or some such nonsense. I don’t really pay attention to my father’s business, or Arthur’s and his father’s for that matter, it bores me silly. Most of the time I think it bores Arthur silly too, but that’s not the point, the point is I don’t want to disappoint my father and it seems as if his heart is set on me marrying Arthur so can you make that happen?”

“Okay. Well,” Merlin said once he realized Elena had finally stopped to take a breath and was waiting for an actual response. “Let’s back everything up a bit here.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Elena said with a disappointed frown. “See! What did I tell you? I mucked it all up.”

“No, you didn’t muck anything up,” Merlin assured her. “I just want you to know how this all works so we’re on the same page.”

“The same page. Right. Always helpful.” Elena nodded.

“The first thing I want to clear up is that you said you wanted me to use my magic to make Arthur fall in love with you, but that’s not how it works.”

“It’s not? But everyone said,” Elena stumbled on her words. “I thought -.”

“Why don’t you have a seat and I’ll explain the ins and outs, okay?” Merlin took pity on Elena and guided her over to his settee.

“But you’re the matchmaker, right? The one with the, you know, magic.” Elena whispered the last word again and Merlin could only imagine how she’d been told of his services. He grinned just thinking about it.

“I am,” Merlin nodded. “But in order for my magic to work there has to be feelings there already, something for my magic to work with. I don’t _make_ people fall in love with one another, I simply help things along a little bit.”

“But Hadley told me that you made Marcus fall arse over tit for her just by touching his wrist and doing your magic thingamajig.” Elena made a disgruntled face as if she couldn’t believe she’d been so misinformed by Hadley.

“Well, yes and no,” Merlin said. “Marcus was already arse over tit for Hadley but was too nervous to do anything about it, I just helped give him a little push in the right direction.”

“He was? I kind of thought he mooned over her but she always thought I was seeing things when I told her what I thought.”

“The love and affection was already there,” Merlin said. “It just needed a kick-start.”

“So there needs to be something there already or it won’t work?” Elena asked.

Merlin nodded. “I don’t mess with love like that, and I don’t mess with it because I believe in it. Everyone should have the chance to find the person they were meant to be with. I’m not about to force two people together who were never meant to be.”

Elena seemed to deflate at that. “I’m not sure Arthur and I were meant to be, at least not in the true love and happily ever after kind of way. There is affection there,” Elena assured him, “but I’m not sure if it’s _love_ love.”

“Well, we could always find out, couldn’t we?” Merlin asked, hoping that Elena was intent upon making her father happy and giving her relationship with Arthur a go. At least that way there might possibly be a payday in his near future.

“We could,” Elena sounded doubtful and Merlin was quick to reply.

“You do like him, don’t you? Could you imagine spending the rest of your life with him?”

“I do like him, I even think I might love him. He’s a pretty great guy; he’s amazing out on a pitch, and he’s got a bloody grand seat on his horse, excellent horseman, and a brilliant shot too. You should see him, Merlin, when we go hunting.”

Elena smiled to herself and Merlin took that as an excellent sign.

“It sounds like the two of you get along a treat.”

“We really do, he’s one of my best mates.” Elena was quiet for a moment or two and Merlin could almost see the gears turning in her head. “I think there’s something there,” she finally said. “Something that could use a bit of a kick-start.”

“That’s the spirit,” Merlin said happily. Thank _Christ_. Merlin could practically see the stack of money in his hand. If Elena was from a family involved with the bloody Pendragons she was sure to be flush. Merlin could charge her a fortune.

“So what do we do?” Elena asked as she leaned forward, seemingly more into the idea than she was when she first tentatively stepped into Merlin’s flat.

“It’s fairly easy, actually,” Merlin said. “All you need to do is tell me a bit about yourself; we’ll have coffee or lunch together, so I can get to know you. I need to have sort of, well, the best way I can describe it is a _sense_ , a sense of you, that I can pass onto Arthur when I see him. When I touch people I can sort of send them images -.”

“Like magical email.” Elena grinned.

“Yeah, sort of like that” Merlin smiled back at her. “These flashes are like a pulse from the other person, a wave of thought and memory and possibility. They see the person I’m thinking about and it makes them think of the person as well. It’s like I send out all these little tendrils from you into Arthur and if there’s something there all those same little tendrils inside of him will reach out for yours and they’ll wrap themselves up into these wonderfully tangled knots and he’ll just know you’re meant to be with him, by his side. Always.”

Elena was looking at him with wide blue eyes. She was absolutely gorgeous and Merlin could see the equally gorgeous heart inside of her. He hoped like hell this Arthur was worthy of her because in that one look he knew she was someone that needed to be handled carefully despite all of her bumbling and stuttering. She believed in love, it was as clear as day, and it was written all over her face. Merlin could see the sparkling lines of gold and silver rippling over her skin. It was a beautiful sight.

Elena _believed_.

Wholly. Completely. And Merlin suddenly felt protective of her, fiercely so. Every once in a while a client would come along like Elena, one that affected him in the way she was in that moment. They were always wide-eyed and _glowing_ and Merlin always hoped he did right by them, even more so than the others. They always seemed so fragile, in a way. He imagined Elena was a rough and tumble sort of girl, but love? Love always made you equal parts strong and brittle.

“That’s beautiful,” Elena said, breaking into Merlin’s thoughts.

“It is, isn’t it?”

“Have you had that?” Elena asked. “The love tendrils?”

Merlin smiled wistfully. “Not yet, but I know mine are out there somewhere.”

“Too bad you don’t have a you to help you out.”

Merlin laughed. “Yeah, too bad about that.”

“So,” Elena said as she stood up, “when and where do you want to meet?”

“I’m pretty open so it’s up to you, wherever you feel most comfortable.”

Merlin was expecting Elena to mention some sort of trendy, overpriced restaurant for their meeting but she surprised him by naming a rather out of the way, little place that he often went to himself.

“Wednesday at 1:00 then?” Elena asked after Merlin had agreed to the place.

“Sounds perfect.”

Elena beamed at him as he got up to walk her to the door. Once they were there Elena surprised him once again by pulling him into a rather haphazard and gangly hug. It was sweet and filled with genuine warmth and excitement. Merlin loved those sort of hugs.

“I want to thank you, Merlin,” Elena said once she’d let go of him and stepped back.

“I haven’t done anything yet,” Merlin protested.

“But you will,” Elena said with conviction. “I’ve had this sudden feeling that something really amazing is going to come from this, I just know it.”

Merlin looked down at her and saw her happy smile and flushed, glowing face and thought the same thing. There were great things ahead for Elena.

~*~

Elena left Merlin’s flat feeling better than she had in weeks, ever since her father put forth the idea of marriage to Arthur, really. When he’d first suggested it to her she’d panicked and hadn’t felt right since, but having met with Merlin and come away with such positive energy made her feel light as air.

She tripped out of his door with a wave goodbye and hummed to herself as she walked down the hall to the lift. She was so much in her own little world that she didn’t hear the door across from Merlin’s open up, so she jumped and made an embarrassing shrieking sound when a voice spoke close to her ear.

“Hello again.”

Elena gasped. “You scared the bollocks off of me.”

Gwaine laughed. “I love a woman with a way with words.”

Elena snorted out a laugh. “Yes, I’m very poetic. You should hear my limericks.”

“I’m all ears.”

“And still no shirt, I see,” Elena said as she looked up and down Gwaine’s chest. When she heard him laugh she made a little squeaking sound and covered her mouth with her hand. “Not that I noticed before or anything,” she mumbled through her fingers. “Well, it’s kind of hard _not_ to notice since you’re half naked and all, and very very fit, but that’s not the point! The point is I’m most definitely not looking. Or noticing.”

Gwaine smiled at her. “Good to know,” he said. “I, however, _am_ looking, and while much to my dismay you’re not topless as well, I can still say with the utmost authority and honesty that you’re an absolute delight to look upon.”

Elena snorted again, but still blushed a charming crimson. “You’re a horrid flirt and a terrible liar.”

“I think you meant to say a stupendously talented flirt and a truly honest man.”

Elena rolled her. “Oh yes, that’s what I meant. So glad you set me straight.”

Gwaine smiled at her; it was all white teeth and genuine amusement and Elena felt something flutter in her stomach. She couldn’t help it, Gwaine was bloody beautiful and she wasn’t used to bloody beautiful men smiling at her like that. Arthur was gorgeous too, but she was used to him. She’d become so accustomed to him that she forgot to notice his looks and was usually only reminded of them when someone else mentioned them. But Gwaine? Well, he was something new entirely.

“Do you make a habit of hanging out half dressed at the lift, or am I just lucky?” Elena asked when Gwaine just kept staring at her and smiling.

“Little bit of both,” Gwaine said, and when Elena continued looking at him expectantly he added, “I’m heading down to get my post, it was simply lucky happenstance that we’re waiting for the lift at the same time and now I get to escort a beautiful woman on my way.”

“Ha. Sweet talker.” Elena laughed. “What if I don’t want to share a lift with a shirtless man? Who knows what kind of crazy you are.”

“I can get Merlin to swear to my good-natured insanity.”

“So you don’t deny the crazy bit?”

“Nope, but I’m an incredibly harmless brand of crazy.”

“Good to know.” Elena nodded.

The lift doors dinged open and Gwaine held out an arm. “Ladies first.”

Elena laughed. “Whatever.”

“So,” Gwaine said once the doors closed. “What do I need to do to persuade you to go out to dinner with me?”

“Nothing,” Elena said.

“Oh, so you’re already smitten? I can’t really blame you, I’m extremely charming.”

“Hardly,” Elena snorted. “I meant ‘nothing’ as in ‘do nothing’ because it’s not going to happen.”

Gwaine looked Elena up and down and smiled. “I’ve always loved a challenge.”

Elena laughed outright. “Oh my God, you’re such a slapper. You’re ridiculous. Does that line ever really work?”

“I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”

The lift dinged and the doors opened. Elena was quick to walk out and head towards the front door.

“I guess we will,” she threw over her shoulder with a laugh as she slipped out the door and left Gwaine smiling stupidly to himself.

~*~

“So tell me something about yourself and Arthur,” Merlin said as he sat down across from Elena for lunch.

“Oh, God, I don’t know,” Elena said. “I don’t like talking about myself.”

“Well, okay, that’s fine. Tell me about Arthur then. We can come back to you.”

“Arthur? There’s a lot to tell about him, he’s a really great guy.”

“Start with your favorite thing about him.” Merlin leaned in and set his elbows on the table. He always loved this part of the conversation with his clients, the way their faces would light up when they talked about the person they loved.

“My favorite thing? Hm.” Elena blushed and smiled to herself. “My favorite thing about Arthur is that he laughs every time I accidentally snort, even if he doesn’t think what I’m laughing at is funny. I have a horrible laugh, I sound like a donkey half the time and the other half I sound like a snorting horse - it’s not pretty. I mean, at all. But Arthur? He thinks it’s the best thing ever.” Elena paused for a moment. “I really love that about him, he doesn’t make me feel foolish. It’s a really lovely thing to have someone make you not feel foolish even if you know you are.”

Merlin smiled. “I love that too.”

“I’m not exactly ladylike, and my parents absolutely despair of me. Truly. But Arthur thinks it’s brilliant that I’d rather hunt and ride than go shopping or worry about snagging a husband or any of the other ridiculous things women in our social circle are supposed to care about. Honestly, Merlin, you’d think it was still the 1950s. Not only is it infuriating but it’s insulting too. Whenever we’re at some supposedly fashionable, important do Arthur’ll just roll his eyes at me and wink when he sees I’m bored out of my knickers. He’s good like that. He’s knows who I really am.”

“And likes you for who you really are,” Merlin said. “That’s what we’re all looking for, isn’t it?”

“It is,” Elena said. “And it works out even better when he’s your best mate too.”

“You mentioned that before,” Merlin said. “You told me the two of you grew up together. How long have you known one another?”

“Literally since nappies. I was born ten months after Arthur and our parents have shoved us together ever since. We’ve always been best mates but have been more and less than that at different times in our lives.”

“How do you mean?”

“Like I said, the mates bit always stays the same, but we’ve been on and off our entire lives. We were each other’s first kiss when we were six and dared each other, but that ended up with me planting a mud pie in his face afterward so he didn’t bother trying that again until later.” Elena laughed.

“When did the two of you reignite your torrid love affair?” Merlin teased.

“Arthur was always my escort to parties and balls and all of that nonsense but we went as friends until my sixteenth birthday when he gave me a birthday kiss that started out as just a bit of a peck but ended up being this bloody toe-curling kiss. Surprised the bollocks off of both of us, I can tell you that. But we started dating after that, figured we’d give it a go.”

“And you’ve been together ever since?”

“Oh God, no. We only managed to be together for a few months then before driving each other absolutely nutty. We didn’t hook up again until uni, and that lasted a couple of years, but then Arthur went to America for a while, and all kinds of other places, so we figured we were better off being friends during that time. It wasn’t until he came back a couple of years ago that our parents started in on the whole marriage idea. At first it was only hints, but now it’s sort of full on pressure.”

Merlin watched Elena as she told her and Arthur’s story. Every once in a while she’d stop and chew on her lip, a gesture Merlin noticed she made when she was nervous or uncertain, and he wondered if maybe this wasn’t a good idea after all. He didn’t question Elena’s affection for Arthur, or his for her, but he wondered if there was enough there aside from a desire to please their parents.

And who even knew about Arthur? Merlin hadn’t even met him yet and had no idea what his outlook on the situation was. Merlin started to worry a bit that he had maybe bitten off more than he could chew, or should chew. He wasn’t about to magically meddle where he didn’t belong.

“Elena,” he said quietly. “I have to ask you, are you really sure you want to do this? It seems like maybe you’re doing this more for your parents than for yourself, or for Arthur.”

Elena looked up at him with an indecisive look but said, “No, no, I’m sure. I want this. I know my parents want it too and I won’t lie and say that’s not speeding this along, but Arthur,” she paused and looked down at her clasped hands. “Arthur is a good man and the only man I can see myself wanting to marry. I can’t imagine anyone would be a better match than him.”

She sounded a little more sure, but Merlin still wasn’t entirely convinced.

“Well that’s all I needed to know,” he said with a smile, not wanting Elena to know of his doubts.

~*~

The next time they planned to meet Merlin ended up huddled outside an outlandish art gallery waiting for her. She was nearly twenty minutes late and Merlin was wondering whether or not she was even going to show up.

They had planned on that particular night for him to be introduced to Arthur for the first time. Elena said he was to be at the gallery supporting his crazy half-sister and one of her equally crazy artist friends. Merlin wanted to roll his eyes at every person that passed him on their way into the gallery since each one looked more pretentious and self-centered than the last. He bloody hoped it didn’t bode ill for Arthur’s personality that he’d willingly hang out with such a lot.

Merlin would also admit he was a bit nervous to be meeting Arthur. He always was though, during the first meet with the other person. He always worried about what he’d see in them, that they’d be completely uninterested or totally wrong for his client and he’d be burdened with the task of having to tell him or her the horrible truth. It was never a great way to spend an evening.

And with Elena? Well, Merlin had taken to her so quickly that it would kill him to have to do that to her. There was no way he wanted to break her heart by having to tell her about a disinterested or dickish Arthur.

“Merlin!”

Merlin turned at the shout of his name. He looked across the street to see Elena gesturing wildly at him. He laughed to himself at her goofy, full-bodied wave and the way she hollered at him from across the street when she could have very well waited until she was closer to him.

He waved back and watched her run across the street, only stumbling a little because of her high heels.

“Golly,” Elena puffed out when she reached his side. “Who knew this dump would be so hard to find. I’m fairly sure I was driving in circles for the better part of an hour. I’m not too late, am I?”

Merlin decided to let her off easy and said, “No, not too late.”

Elena must not have believed him, or had gotten a look at what he assumed were his bright red (and freezing cold) ears, because she grabbed his arm and twisted it until she could get a look at his watch.

“Oh bollocks,” she shouted. “Merlin, you bloody liar! I’m nearly half an hour late.”

Merlin waved her off. “Don’t worry about it.”

“God, I’m such a tit. I should have just asked for directions, or turned my sat nav on but I bloody well hate that thing and the way it orders you about all condescending just because it knows where it is.”

Merlin laughed. “Elena, honestly, it’s okay. I got to stand here and silently make fun of all the pretentious snobs as they passed me by on their way in.”

Elena snorted out a laugh and rolled her eyes. “Aren’t they the worst? And you haven’t even had to listen to them yet. Arthur can barely keep from laughing when one of them gets going about the thrust of humanity present in a piece that is basically a manky old toilet on a pedestal. Morgana usually gives him a good slap before he gets me going as well. She hates taking us anywhere.”

Merlin smiled; he suddenly had a good feeling about Arthur, and his nerves diminished somewhat.

“Why does she invite him if she knows how he’ll act?”

“Because the two of them are ridiculous; they love each other like mad, but feel it’s their job to drive the other insane at every possible opportunity. It’s been a demented sort of game between them ever since they were young. Morgana knows places like this pain Arthur to no end, but she also knows he’ll walk through fire for her and support her in everything she does so she uses it against him.”

“She sounds horrid.”

“She’s absolutely dreadful, and one of Arthur’s favorite people in the whole world. Mine too.”

Merlin laughed. “If you say so.”

“You’ll understand once you get to know her.”

Merlin just nodded. He didn’t want to point out that he wasn’t actually going to get to know Morgana because he wouldn’t be in any of their lives long enough to do so.

Elena grabbed his hand and pulled him through the doors of the gallery.

“Come on,” she said excitedly, “time for introductions.”

Merlin let her drag him towards the back of the gallery. The place was filled with people and he kept looking around to see if he could figure out who Arthur was before Elena pointed him out. He loved to test himself to see if he could sense the other person, to feel the pull of him or her as they responded to Merlin’s client. He wasn’t really getting a normal sort of vibe though, not like the little spike of awareness he usually did when getting near his target. What he felt was more than that, more than that quick spike, his magic was thrumming inside him like the low hum of amps being set up. It was a thrum of anticipation, of excitement, of that first roller coaster drop. Merlin felt it all the way to the tips of his fingers and toes.

He had no idea what was going on, he’d never felt such a thing before. He’d always been excited for his clients, for all the hopes he had for them, but this? This seemed so much more. Whatever it was was doing a damn good job of shaking Merlin awake, and not just the little _‘time to wake up’_ morning shove, this was a fucking _life_ wake up.

“There he is,” Elena said as she tugged on Merlin’s hand and pointed in front of her.

Merlin looked in the direction of her point and proceeded to nearly trip over his own feet at the sudden burst of magic burning up inside him. It was instantaneous and bright, a brilliant surge of magic filling every single cell inside his body until it felt like he would lift off the ground from the force of it.

“Oh God,” he managed to choke out.

Elena had stopped walking at his stumble and grabbed his elbow. “Are you okay?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” Merlin answered honestly. “Oh God, I don’t know.”

Elena ran her hand down his arm and back to his hand. “You’re so warm,” she said. “Are you ill?”

Merlin shook his head. “No,” he whispered, “far from it.”

He could feel Elena staring at him and poking at him as if to discover the source of his sudden fit, but he knew she'd never find it because it wasn't anything to do with him and _everything_ to do with the man standing in front of them, the one she'd just pointed out.

Arthur.

Merlin couldn’t tear his eyes away from him. He could only stand and stare and try to keep his feet planted on the floor.

There wasn’t anything particularly extraordinary about Arthur--yes, he was blond and gorgeous and standing in just the right spot that one of the gallery’s spotlights was shining off of him and making him glow like some sort of big, fucking hero--but he wasn’t anything beyond that. There wasn’t anything about him that screamed out his singularity, his uniqueness, yet -.

Yet.

Merlin knew without a doubt that he was extraordinary, that within him there was contained a million different things, insignificant and grand both, that made him somehow _more_. Merlin knew it. He knew there would be a hundred things they’d argue about, but a thousand more that they’d agree on down to their cores. And all Merlin wanted to do in that moment was press his face into Arthur’s neck and breathe in all of those hundred, thousand, million things.

“Merlin,” Elena’s voice cut through the fog of Merlin’s rushing thoughts.

Merlin turned to her, a stunned look on his face, and said, “That’s Arthur?”

The bright flush of happiness and the smile that spread across her lips as she proudly said, “yes,” just about split Merlin’s heart in half.

Arthur was Elena’s.

His client. His target.

Not his -. Well. Not _his_.

“And that’s Morgana beside him,” Elena continued. “Can you believe her? How is that dress staying on her? I’d be blushing from my head down to my toes if I wore that in public. She has the biggest bollocks of anyone I know.”

Merlin tried to smile at Elena and her assessment of Morgana but he was too caught up in staring at Arthur, at trying to get himself under control.

“But we can talk about Morgana’s bollocks later,” Elena said as she grabbed his elbow once again. “What about you? Are you okay? You’re not really answering me properly and I’m complete and utter crap at this sort of thing. I’d be a horrid nurse, honestly dreadful. I tried to take care of Arthur once when he was sick and I spilt soup all down his lap and turned his chest hair green, but that bit wasn’t my fault at all, it was the fault of that dodgy remedy I found on the internet. It said to spread it on your chest to help with breathing but it didn’t help one bit and Arthur looked like a leprechaun for three weeks.”

Merlin choked out a startled bark of laughter at that, but kept his eyes on Arthur.

“I’m fine, Elena. Truly,” he tried to reassure her.

“Well, if you’re sure.” Elena seemed uncertain about what to do but she soldiered on anyway. “Come on then, let me introduce you to Arthur and Morgana.”

Merlin nodded and let her start pulling him once again in Arthur’s direction. They maneuvered themselves past a small group of people and when Merlin looked up next he found Arthur staring back at him.

He was surprised he didn’t stumble again under the onslaught of that stare but he found his feet kept walking, bringing him closer to Arthur, who, Merlin realized, seemed to be as stunned as he was himself.

Merlin watched Arthur’s wide, blue eyes and let them lock with his own. He knew he should look away and break whatever it was that was making his magic go fucking ballistic inside of him, making his feet keep walking steady and sure towards Arthur. But he couldn’t stop himself, and didn’t really want to, not once Arthur broke away from Morgana’s side and started walking towards them as well.

“Arthur!”

Elena’s voice startled Merlin, and it seemed to do the same to Arthur because he stopped suddenly and blinked before looking away from Merlin and towards Elena.

“Elena.” Arthur’s voice was low and warm and Merlin closed his eyes against the sound. “I’m so glad you’re here. Save me.”

Elena laughed beside him and Merlin managed a soft laugh himself.

“Where does she keep finding these plonkers?” Elena whispered, but it was rather louder than it ought to have been and several people around them turned to look at her. Merlin watched Arthur as he smiled at her in amusement rather than in irritation at her minor faux pas.

Arthur took Elena’s hand in his and gently pulled her in for a kiss to her cheek.

“You know Morgana, she’s some sort of pretentious idiot magnet.” Arthur wrapped his arm around Elena’s waist and leaned towards her. “Introduce us.”

“Oh. Fuck. Sorry,” Elena sputtered. “Merlin, Arthur. Arthur, Merlin.”

Merlin watched his hand reach out on its own accord towards Arthur’s and when he took it in his own Merlin gasped at the surge of magic that burst within him.

“Hello,” Merlin managed to get out.

Arthur seemed momentarily stunned into speechlessness and only nodded at him, but he didn’t let go of Merlin’s hand until Elena walked between them and broke their grip apart on her way to give Morgana an enthusiastic hug. Arthur looked down at their broken apart hands and then back up at Merlin before sort of laughing in confusion, like he couldn’t believe what had just happened.

“I’m sorry,” he said as he shook his head and ran his hand through his hair. “Sort of tuned out for a bit there, didn’t mean to hold you hostage.”

Merlin felt Arthur’s same sort of dazed wonder and gave him credit for trying to ease the moment by blaming himself. There really wasn’t a way Merlin could tell him that he could keep him hostage forever without sounding like a complete lunatic so he only smiled softly at Arthur in response.

“This is Morgana,” Elena said as she pushed Morgana in front of Merlin. “And Morgana’s dress, or should I say these are Morgana’s tits instead? The dress is rather secondary, isn’t it?”

“Elena!” Arthur laughed; it was a loud bark of laughter and Merlin wanted to hear it again. Immediately.

“What? I already discussed this with Merlin and he agreed.”

Arthur turned back to Merlin with an amused quirk of his lips and a raised eyebrow. “Oh, you did?”

Merlin felt his eyes widen in shock as he took in Arthur’s stare, Morgana’s laughter, and Elena’s encouraging smile.

“Go on, didn’t I say she had a great set of bollocks on her?” Elena asked.

“I didn’t say a word.” Merlin held up his hands in defense. “Honestly.”

“Only you, El,” Morgana said fondly as she laughed and tucked away a stray curl behind Elena’s ear.

“What?” Elena asked when Arthur started grinning at her too.

“Don’t worry, Merlin,” Morgana said as she held out a hand to him, “I know what Elena likely said to you and the fact that you’re probably entirely innocent. I promise not to hold it against you.”

“Christ,” Merlin breathed. “I thought I was going to get tossed out on my arse by the hostess’ brother before the night even got properly started.”

“Yeah, no worries on that score,” Arthur said. “If I had to toss everyone out on their arses that insulted Morgana I’d throw my back out.”

“Shut up, you tit,” Morgana said as she pinched Arthur, and rather hard too judging by the sound he made in response. “I happen to be a lovely person, stop disparaging me to Merlin, I’d like to at least try to make a good first impression.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that.” Elena waved Morgana away. “I told him how wretched you are, he already knows.”

There was another perfect splutter of laughter from Arthur and it made Merlin warm all over.

“Honestly, Elena.” Arthur said through his laughter.

“Stop making fun of me and let’s start walking around and pretending like we know what all of this is supposed to mean,” Elena said as she twirled her finger around her head at all of the art pieces surrounding them.

Arthur held out his elbow for Elena to hook her arm through and looked over at Merlin. “Please tell me you’re not one of them and that you actually know what all this crap means.”

“Some people are more enlightened than others,” Morgana said. “It’s just unfortunate that you and Elena are stupid.”

“And now you know how all our childhood arguments ended,” Arthur said to Merlin, “by Morgana insulting me and then telling me I’m stupid because she has no better comeback.”

Merlin laughed. “A fascinating look into your childhood psyche there,” he said. “And no, I’m not one of them, I actually haven’t a clue what we’re looking at here. I think I passed a wooden chair with an egg sitting on it on the way in. I’m officially lost.”

“Good man,” Arthur said as he reached out and gave Merlin’s shoulder a quick squeeze. “I was worried Elena saddled me with a Morgana minion for the night.”

“No chance of that,” Elena said as she leaned forward and looked past Arthur to smile at him. “Merlin’s brilliant.”

Elena turned away from them to stare at a truly horrendous painting on the wall but Arthur kept his eyes focused solely on Merlin and said softly, “Yeah, I think I got that impression too.”

Merlin felt himself blush, but managed to blurt out under his breath, “Hardly brilliant.”

Arthur seemed to take a step closer to Merlin even though he was still attached to Elena at the elbow. Merlin couldn’t stop himself from taking a step closer to Arthur as well. He was like a fucking magnet and Merlin was filled head to toe with lead filings. Whatever part of him was closest to Arthur felt loose and warm and like it was moving of its own accord towards Arthur, all the cells inside of him gathering together and drawing him closer.

“No,” Arthur said, his voice still low and shocking to Merlin’s system. “I think Elena has the right of it.”

Merlin didn’t know what to say to that so he just shrugged and gave Arthur a goofy smile and a muttered, _‘thanks,’_ and suddenly wished himself anywhere but where he was.

He followed Arthur and Elena as she pulled him around the gallery by his elbow. Merlin was mute and kept his eyes firmly on Arthur, and Arthur kept looking back at him in a sort of daze and bumping into Elena’s back every time she stopped because all of his attention was focused on Merlin. Elena kept up a steady stream of disparaging commentary with Morgana who told her to shut it but laughed every time she said anything. Merlin could feel Morgana’s quiet, assessing gaze on him and Arthur from time to time but even the threat of pure embarrassment over what she must have been thinking about him couldn’t tear his focus away from Arthur.

Every time Arthur would look back at Merlin and catch him looking too, a surprised little smile would cross his face. It was all Merlin could do not to tear him away from Elena and push him into a darkened corner and kiss that stupid smiling mouth.

They must have both mumbled appropriate responses and feigned laughter at the right times because it took Elena a few minutes to realize neither one of them were truly into the conversation.

“You’re off your game tonight, Arthur,” Elena said as she stopped walking and shook Arthur’s elbow. “Look at all this shite, it’s the perfect opportunity to take the piss out of Morgana and you’re standing there like a lump.”

“It’s like you’re in your own little world,” Morgana said as she passed significant looks between Merlin and Arthur.

“Christ, Morgana, it’s like you want me to insult you and your friends,” Arthur said.

“Well you’d hardly be you if you didn’t.”

Arthur gave Morgana a look, but it was clearly one she was used to because she just raised an eyebrow at him.

“Would you stop,” Arthur said with half a smile. “You’re going to make Merlin think you don’t love me at all.”

“Oh, I’m sure he already picked up on that.”

Arthur laughed out loud. “Fuck off, troll, I’m going out for a smoke.”

“You don’t smoke,” Elena said.

“Yes, well, Merlin does and I’m going out with him to keep him company,” Arthur said as he untangled himself from Elena and grabbed Merlin’s arm to steer him towards the exit.

“You do?” Elena directed the question at Merlin.

“Not actually, no -,” Merlin started to say but Arthur interrupted as he started to walk away with Merlin in tow.

“Nasty habit, trying to quit,” Arthur said over his shoulder as the two of them got further away from Elena and Morgana.

Merlin watched as Elena waved the two of them off with an eye roll, but Morgana kept her eyes on them until they were lost to the crowd.

“Sorry,” Arthur said as he let go of Merlin’s arm, “I didn’t mean to lie but I had to get away for a second.”

“Yeah, that’s fine,” Merlin said as he followed Arthur out a side door to the pavement outside. “It was strange in there, I didn’t mean to -.”

“Really strange,” Arthur agreed, his words rushed. “I just couldn’t get my bearings. I didn’t know -. I just. I had to get you out here and do this.”

Before Merlin could ask what ‘this’ was Arthur’s hands were on either side of his face and his back was against the bricks of the building as Arthur’s lips pressed against his in a rush of breath and urgency. Merlin reached up and wrapped his hands around Arthur’s wrists and held on as he kissed back. A flood of magic surged through him and he felt the energy ripple out of him in waves. He was just barely coherent enough to sense the lamppost near them flickering once before bursting apart in a shower of sparks.

  


There were bells and whistles going off in the logical part of his brain telling him everything about the moment was fucking wrong and a horrible move and if Arthur kept kissing him like he was Merlin’s magic would put out every damn light in London, but everything else within him told him to keep his hold on Arthur and never let him go.

Arthur gasped against Merlin’s lips in surprise at the sound of the lamppost exploding, but Merlin’s traitorous lips chased after Arthur’s and pressed him into a deeper kiss. Arthur’s breath was warm and he tasted like champagne and Merlin opened up to him, kissed his lips like he couldn’t get enough of him, which was only the truth. He decided he could think about going to hell later, but in that moment all he wanted to know was the curve of Arthur’s mouth and the frantically beating pulse of his wrists that Merlin held on to so tightly.

Merlin had just moved one of his hands to Arthur’s side, had slipped it under his jacket to feel the heat of him through the smooth fabric of his button down, when the door they’d just come through - although it could have been hours ago for all Merlin was aware - opened and a burst of light and noise and too loud laughter broke them apart.

Merlin immediately turned to the door to make sure it wasn’t Elena and thanked fucking God when he noticed it wasn’t anyone he knew holding the door open. Arthur must have done the same because Merlin felt a puff of relieved breath against his neck and a mumbled, _‘shit,’_ from Arthur as he briefly pressed his forehead against Merlin’s before pulling away from him. Merlin knew he made a pathetic sort of sound when he lost Arthur’s warmth but he forced himself to step away as well.

“Fuck,” Merlin breathed.

“I know. I know. God,” Arthur said as he held out his hand towards Merlin in an awkward gesture that he quickly abandoned to let his arm drop back to his side. “I’m sorry.”

“I should never have done that,” Merlin said as he looked at Arthur with wide eyes. “What the fuck was I thinking?”

“It’s my fault, I’m the one who dragged you out here. Kissed you. I never should have assumed, I just -. I saw you across that fucking gallery and it was like one of those stupid film scenes and I’ve been an idiot all night long. I’m sorry.”

Merlin heard Arthur’s words but they weren’t computing properly in his head; all he could think about was what a fuck up he was. Elena was his client, and Arthur too, in a way, and it was flat out fucked up what he’d done. He knew, he _knew_ , that Arthur and Elena were all but engaged and he had just stood there and let Arthur kiss him.

“I shouldn’t have,” Merlin said. “I knew about you and Elena, I -.”

“About me and Elena?” Arthur asked. “What are you -?”

Arthur didn’t get the rest of his question out because the door opened again and now it _was_ Elena.

“I’ve had enough of that,” she laughed as she bumped the door with her backside to close it. “Did you see that thing by the door that looked like a pile of clothes hangers? Honestly.”

“Remind me to bring my pile of dirty underwear next time Morgana drags us to one of these things. I could sell it for a few thousand pounds,” Arthur said.

“Make sure there’s an egg on top,” Elena laughed.

“God, yes, what was that even?” Arthur asked, he sounded relatively normal but Merlin could hear the breathlessness of his voice. “I wanted to sit on that chair and smash the damn egg to bits.”

“Or you could have just hatched it,” Merlin heard himself saying.

“Yes,” Arthur said as he turned his overly bright eyes towards Merlin, “I could have.”

Elena snorted a bit as she laughed. “Perfect, it could have been a piece of performance art. Well done, Merlin. You should show your work next time too.”

“I’ll go out for a carton of eggs first thing tomorrow morning.”

Merlin tried to keep his eyes on Elena as she laughed because he could feel Arthur staring at him and he didn’t know if he could get through this farce if he looked at him.

“Let’s go out for drinks,” Elena suggested. “I think we deserve them.”

“I can’t,” Merlin said at the same time Arthur said, “I have an early morning.”

Elena frowned. “Spoilsports.”

“I’m sorry, El,” Arthur said.

“Yeah, me too,” Merlin added. He had already started to back up to leave as he awkwardly pointed behind him in the general direction of the tube station. “I’ve really got to go, but call me, okay?”

Elena grinned at him and gave him a little thumbs up behind Arthur’s back as she called out, “I will!”

Merlin gave her a wave and turned on his heels to quickly walk away. Arthur hadn’t even said a goodbye but Merlin could feel his stare boring into his back and watching his every step as he hurried away. He knew he looked a fool but he had to get away and put some distance between himself and Arthur.

He needed space and time to figure out what the fuck had just happened.

~*~

Over the next few days Merlin hid in his flat. He ignored calls from Elena and had to work up the courage to listen to her voicemails because he was wracked with guilt over what he had done.

And the fact that, deep down, he wasn’t sorry it had happened.

Kissing Arthur had been the moment, that life-altering moment that set your life on a entirely different track and had the power to change you completely. Merlin had always been a romantic at heart, there was no other way to explain why he’d ended up doing what he did, and he had known there was that one person out there that he was meant to be with. And now, thanks to some hellaciously messed up ‘fuck you’ from fate, that one person happened to be all but engaged to a client.

He knew he should step away, that he should be angry at Arthur for kissing him in the first place and betraying Elena like that, but he just couldn’t. Every time he thought about Arthur it sent his magic humming through him; it was like his magic was giddy, ready to leap out of his skin and zig-zag its way back to Arthur.

Merlin had never felt that before. His magic had always lived inside him, had breathed and pulsed within him, but it had never worked itself up into this violent swirl of emotion. It had never felt like it wanted to break free and leap towards someone else like it did with Arthur. He wanted to curse it; the damned thing had shorted out basically every electrical appliance Merlin touched since coming home from the gallery that night, but the charge felt bloody fantastic.

And that was the problem. He craved more of it, he craved _Arthur_ , and the way he felt when he was with him. It was ridiculous how quickly it had happened and Merlin knew he should think twice about something so sudden, that it couldn’t possibly be real, but everything in him was telling him it was. That whatever it was that was driving Merlin and Arthur towards one another was real, irrevocably so.

But then Merlin had to listen to Elena’s enthusiastic voicemails telling him how well the evening went and when could he do his thing with Arthur and did he think that, once he did, Arthur would propose instantly, or would it take time? Merlin pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose and his headache intensified with every voicemail.

He even went so far as to flat out ignore the knock on his door when Elena stopped by to drop off the first half of his payment because, as she happily told him, he deserved it. He’d had no idea how she’d even gotten into the building, but as he sat and watched the envelope slide under his door he’d heard Gwaine’s voice in the hallway and a burst of laughter from Elena, and he knew Gwaine had been all too happy to buzz her up. Because, of course, Gwaine had decided to develop a massive crush on Elena after seeing her out that day she’d come to visit. Every time he’d seen Merlin since then all he could do was sing her praises while Merlin tried to divert his attention away from her. And it was so hypocritical of him because the entire time he was trying to get Gwaine’s mind off of Elena he was thinking about Arthur’s lips.

As Gwaine’s and Elena’s voices continued on in the hallway outside his door Merlin flung himself face down onto his settee and screamed in frustration into his pillow.

What was his life even?

~*~

“So I figured,” Gwaine said as he leaned against his open doorway and watch Elena knock on Merlin’s door, “since I was kind enough to buzz you up that you’d return the favor and buzz me up as well.”

Elena burst out laughing, a loud braying sort of laughter that only comes out of people when they let themselves open up and not give a fuck. It made Gwaine smile like a fool.

“That is the worst line ever,” Elena huffed out as her laughter finally started to die down. “How do you ever pull anyone with utter crap like that?”

Gwaine just raised an eyebrow at her and leered as he swept his hand down the length of his body. Elena laughed again.

“Oh yes, I can see now how that could work in your favor.” Elena grinned crookedly at him. “If by chance the women you were trying to pull have an IQ of sixty and no self-esteem.”

Gwaine frowned. “Is sixty good? I’d imagine it’s near genius level.”

“Einstein levels. Definitely.” Elena nodded.

“That’s what I thought. And by no self-esteem you obviously meant a highly refined level of taste.”

“Absolutely. That’s exactly what I meant.”

Gwaine laughed and Elena felt herself blush as a little thrill went through her that she’d made him.

As Gwaine’s laughter died down they both grew silent; Gwaine kept a steady gaze on Elena as she stood by Merlin’s door and awkwardly shifted from foot to foot while she clutched her bag to her chest. She could still feel the heat of her blush staining her cheeks and it wasn’t going to get any better with Gwaine looking at her like he was.

“Merlin’s actually home, you know,” Gwaine broke the silence between them. “But he’s in a strop. He never opens the door when he’s in a strop. He’s like a six year old told to eat his veggies.”

“But I have something for him,” Elena said as she dug around in her purse and pulled out the envelope with the check for half of his fee. She held it up for Gwaine to see. “I want to make sure he gets it.”

“He did well for you then, the other night?” Gwaine asked, and for some reason Elena couldn’t fathom, he seemed to be disappointed by it. Elena would’ve thought he’d have been happy for his friend’s success.

Elena nodded. “He did. But he was just meeting Arthur, it wasn’t anything beyond that,” she felt the need to add.

“So no hocus-pocus yet?” Gwaine asked as he wiggled his fingers at her.

Elena shifted to her other foot. Fuck it was embarrassing that someone other than Merlin knew she needed romantic intervention. All kinds of people got happily engaged without any sort of help at all and here she was, the tit that had to pay to get things going. Gwaine must have noticed a change in her expression because he was quick to speak again.

“You know, there’s something incredibly naively innocent and sweet about what Merlin does, and that there are people that believe and hope in love and magic enough to allow him to help them.”

“And here I was thinking I was utterly pathetic,” Elena said with more than a hint of self-deprecation in her voice. “You make it sound almost lovely.”

Gwaine shrugged. “It _is_ lovely, to believe in love and magic like that. There’s all kinds of paths to take to get to where we need to go, this way is yours.”

Gwaine was so kind, his voice so sincere, that Elena felt a lump building up in her throat. She had no idea how he’d so gently turned her burning embarrassment into little flickers of hope.

“Thank you,” was all she could manage to say.

Gwaine smiled. “You’re welcome.”

They stood and stared at each other again for a few moments before Gwaine nodded towards Merlin’s door.

“Your best bet is to just slide the envelope under the door. He’ll get it eventually, when he decides to put on his big boy knickers.”

“Oh,” Elena said as she looked down at the envelope still clutched in her hand; she had forgotten it was there. “I suppose that would work the best.”

Elena bent over to slip the envelope under the door, and had she been aware of Gwaine’s dedicated focus - and clear appreciation - of her backside while she was doing it, she would have blushed a furious red.

“I guess that’s that,” she said once she popped back up and turned to look at Gwaine. “Hopefully he’ll call me soon.”

“He will, don’t worry,” Gwaine assured her. “His strops, though dramatic, are usually short-lived. Although this must be a good one because I haven’t seen him in days. And I’m hungry.”

Elena laughed. “What does that have to do with it?”

“Merlin feeds me.”

“Like a pet?”

“Hm. Yeah. Pretty much.”

Elena just smiled and shook her head. She was about to turn to go when Gwaine’s arm shot out and his fingers brushed against the bare skin of her forearm. The touch made her shiver.

“Come in for a cuppa?” he asked.

Elena looked up into his brown eyes and realized he looked strangely vulnerable just then, hopeful and uncertain all at once, and it made her suddenly want all the tea in the world.

“Yes,” she said as a huge smile spread across her face. “I’m dying of thirst.”

Gwaine clapped his hands together, smiled back. “Brilliant. Come in.”

Elena followed Gwaine into his flat. When she got inside she looked around at the clothes, magazines, and empty takeaway cartons tossed everywhere and grinned.

“You’re a pig,” she said happily.

“I’m what now?” Gwaine asked as he looked over his shoulder at her, a box of tea already in his hand.

“You’re an absolute pig,” Elena repeated.

Elena looked over at Gwaine just in time to see a slight blush stain his cheeks before he turned back to making their tea. Her heart gave a solid thud in her chest at seeing him suddenly embarrassed.

“Yeah, I know,” he mumbled. “I live in utter filth. Merlin is always trying to get me to clean up, and I do try, but it always ends up this way again. I told him if he loved me at all he’d clean it up for me. Sorry for the mess.”

“No, no don’t apologize,” Elena said as she walked over to stand by his side at the kitchen counter. “It’s brilliant. Everyone I know has maids or whatnot and their places are always immaculate. I’m an absolute mess and everyone tut-tuts me for it.”

“Well, I can hardly tut-tut you, at least not in good conscience.”

“I know,” Elena’s smile was wide and the look of her sent a shot straight through to Gwaine’s gut. “You’re my people.”

Gwaine laughed as Elena hooked her arm through his and tugged him closer for a bit of squeeze mixed with a half hug. Whatever it was, Gwaine enjoyed the hell out of it, the soft curve of her breasts pushing against his bicep and the smell of her wafting into his nose. She smelt like clean laundry and fucking sunshine. He almost told her so but she let go of him and stepped back with a small little squeak of a noise and mumbled apology.

“I’m always so touchy-feely,” she said. “I forget not everyone is like that. Morgana always says not everyone likes their personal bubble popped.”

She sort of shrugged and laughed at herself and Gwaine thought Morgana must be a bit of a pill if she tried to squash down Elena’s natural exuberance. It was endearing, sweet, and Gwaine found it a crime to think otherwise.

Gwaine turned to look at her. “Pop away,” he said. “I don’t mind.”

“Really?”

She sounded so relieved that Gwaine had to add what he’d been thinking.

“I wouldn’t try to change that about you for the world. You’re like a breath of fresh air.”

Elena opened her mouth to say something but closed it and simply looked at Gwaine. He felt sort of ridiculous for having said anything at all, but then a look passed across Elena’s face, a sort of wonder and a happiness that made Gwaine instantly forget his regret at opening his mouth.

“You’re lovely,” Elena said, her voice very quiet and sincere.

“I’m your people,” Gwaine said.

Elena blinked at that, but seemed to get it anyway because she smiled softly at him.

“That you are,” she agreed.

Gwaine left it at that and went back to making their tea, Elena still close at his side.

Right where he felt she belonged.

~*~

Merlin sat down on the floor and picked up the envelope Elena had slipped under his door. He tore it open and took a couple of deep breaths as he looked at the amount written on the check.

And that was only half of it.

At the beginning Merlin had told Elena that usually he took half of the fee after meeting the object of the client’s affection and finding out whether or not he or she was suitable for his matchmaking--the rest of it would come if the matchmaking actually worked. Elena was simply following through with their deal, yet looking at the check made Merlin ill. How could he possibly take money from Elena when all he could think about was groping her future fiance in an alleyway?

And Arthur was the one who started it in the first place. That’s what confused Merlin the most. From everything Elena had told him about Arthur he’d had such high hopes for a successful match. He’d wanted it so badly for Elena’s sake and he’d gone into the whole evening so sure of himself and of the Arthur Elena had portrayed to him. He’d been flat out slapped with his own instantaneous attraction to Arthur, but that was his problem to deal with, his misfortune. But Arthur? Arthur was supposed to be devoted to Elena.

Arthur was supposed to have been better than that.

It confused and disappointed Merlin both. And the thing was, there was still something deep down inside of Merlin that kept telling him that Arthur actually _was_ better than that. There was something so solid about Arthur, and not in a staid, dull sort of way. Merlin had felt a powerful sense of calm and warmth surrounding Arthur, an all out goodness that was hard to describe. Merlin didn’t know if it was something everyone could see or if it was an offshoot of his magic that gave him the gift, but there were just some people that _glowed_. Not like some flashing Christmas bulb, but with an inner light that reached out for you and made you safe, secure in the fact that they would always handle you with care.

In Merlin’s eyes, Arthur glowed.

But Elena did as well, and there was the rub.

Merlin wanted to believe there was more to Arthur’s side of the story than he knew. He wanted things to make sense. What he didn’t want was to break Elena’s heart.

But the more he thought about that night, the more he thought about Arthur, he knew that if he did this for Elena, that if he made sure her heart wasn’t broken, he’d be breaking his own in the process.

And like a sign from the gods, those annoying twats that liked to wreak havoc with the lesser beings and crap all over their lives, Merlin’s mobile vibrated in his pocket. He pulled it out to find yet another text from Arthur.

They had started out very polite and proper--asking if it was okay that he’d asked Elena for his number, could he text him, and perhaps they could meet at this coffee shop Arthur loved? They had moved onto apologies for their frequency and their numbers, which then morphed into jokes about being in for a pound if Merlin was to turn him in for text stalking him, and finally they had veered towards Arthur’s random thoughts. Some were sweet, some were just outright bizarre, some were flirty, and some made Merlin laugh out loud.

And the worst part was that Merlin found himself waiting in anticipation for their arrival like a man in a desert waiting on a glass of ice water. He craved them, it was as simple as that, and with each one he fell further and further down the rabbit hole.

Merlin looked down at his mobile and wanted to cry in frustration at the way his heart nearly leapt out of his chest at what was displayed there.

_work unbearable. but then remembered exact colour of your eyes. best moment of the day._

Merlin cursed under his breath and tightened his hold on his mobile. He’d been trying all day to delete Arthur’s texts and he couldn’t make himself do it. Arthur was having entire conversations with him, one-sided, but still. Every silly, sweet, or stupid text was part of the whole and each one made Merlin feel more and more certain that he hadn’t been wrong about the type of man Arthur was.

But then he looked at the check in his other hand and remembered why it was he’d met Arthur in the first place, and a lump formed in his throat full of regret and indecision.

He didn’t know what to do.

~*~

After pacing his flat for hours on end Merlin somehow made a decision and found himself on his way to Arthur’s work. Elena had told him that Arthur and Morgana worked in the non-profit branch of their father’s company, much to their father’s annoyance and their satisfaction.

The fact that Arthur was feeding children in Africa and saving baby pandas and penguins and the world in general did nothing to alleviate the wretched pounding of his heart whenever he thought about him. Merlin felt he really ought to want to punch Arthur in the face, his perfect perfect face.

Ugh.

When Merlin reached the building he squared his shoulders and headed into the lobby. He was on a mission and nothing was going to get in his way.

Except the fact that apparently everyone in the entire building had decided to use the lifts at the exact same moment as Merlin, and of course Pendragon Enterprises occupied the top floors.

Of course.

Merlin impatiently waited as they stopped time and time again to let people on and off, the fiery determination of his mission quickly abandoning him the longer he stood there. The doors opened one last time a couple of floors below Arthur’s for the only other person left on the lift with him.

Merlin muttered an annoyed, _‘finally,’_ under his breath but just before the lift doors closed a familiar figure slipped between them.

Bollocks.

Merlin had _not_ planned for that. What the hell was Arthur doing on the wrong floor and what did he think he was doing hijacking Merlin’s lift?

"Hey, it's you." Arthur smiled happily.

Merlin shrugged and gave him a, 'yeah, it's me' look all the while feeling utterly stupid and at a complete loss as to how to proceed. His pseudo-speech he’d pseudo-planned abandoned him entirely. Every single word he’d ever known apparently somehow managed to commit mass suicide by leaping down the lift shaft.

"Did you get my texts?" Arthur paused, then sheepishly added, "All one hundred and eighty-seven of them?" Then he had the audacity to blush and make Merlin all wobbly in the knees.

Merlin took a deep breath. "Yeah, I did. They're actually the reason I'm here. I was looking for you."

"You were?" Arthur's voice sounded so excited, hopeful, that Merlin felt his heart clench in his chest.

"I was. Well. I um, I'm here to tell you to stop sending them. In person, you know, seeing as how telling you in texts didn't seem to work."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Sorry."

Arthur shrugged it off, waved a hand at Merlin. "Don't worry about it. It was worth a try."

Merlin nodded but kept quiet. He could tell Arthur didn’t mean a word of it; he looked heartbroken and Merlin wanted to take it all back.

"I mean that night at the art gallery, I just thought -. Well, never mind that." Arthur held out a hand to Merlin. "No hard feelings?"

Merlin knew it was a mistake, an epic, tragic mistake, but he reached for Arthur's hand anyway.

"None at all," he said as he wrapped his fingers around Arthur's hand and felt the instant rush of energy surge through him, just as it had at the gallery.

The lights flickered in the lift as it shuddered once, twice, then stopped altogether.

_Damn damn damn._

“What the hell?” Arthur said as his free hand shot out towards the wall of the lift to balance himself when the lift rattled to a stop, his other hand stayed firmly wrapped around Merlin’s.

“The lift stopped,” Merlin said inanely.

“So I see,” Arthur said dryly.

Merlin realized what he’d said and felt like an idiot as he tried to extract his hand from Arthur’s hold. Arthur held firmly though and didn’t let him go. He looked down at their clasped hands and wondered how two things could fit so well together, could look so right.

“Best call maintenance,” Arthur said as he opened up the small door that held the emergency intercom button.

Merlin almost blurted out that there was no need, he could fix the lift himself since it was his fault it’d stopped in the first place. His brain was a bit mad at the moment with thoughts of spending any amount of time in such a small, confined space with Arthur, trying to process the feel of Arthur’s hand in his, the warmth and solidity of it, and getting his wayward, traitorous magic to settle down. Arthur's voice speaking calmly to the maintenance person brought Merlin back to himself, stopping him before he could say anything foolish.

“Yes, lift seven, that’s correct.”

Merlin didn’t hear any of what the maintenance man said to Arthur, he was too busy panicking to be any use at all, but Arthur's sudden laugh drew Merlin's attention back to their conversation.

“What do you mean there’s nothing wrong with lift seven? Clearly there is since I’m standing here stuck in it.”

Merlin bit his lip as the maintenance man said that nothing was showing up on the grid, whatever that meant.

“Well obviously there _is_ something wrong,” Arthur said. “Else I wouldn’t be talking to you right now.”

Merlin would’ve laughed at the conversation going on between Arthur and the maintenance man if he hadn’t been busy berating himself for taking Arthur’s hand in the first place. His emotions had been all over the place and that was when his magic acted up the most. He’d remembered the street lights flickering and bursting into a thousand little sparks when he and Arthur had kissed outside the gallery, what had he expected to happen when they touched again? When he was so out of sorts and lacking in any kind of control where Arthur was concerned?

It was like his magic fed off of Arthur and burned brighter with every swallow. Merlin was torn between shoving Arthur aside and climbing through the escape panel in the ceiling of the lift and shoving Arthur to the floor to somehow try to satiate the unbearable need Merlin had for him whenever he was within arm’s reach.

“He certainly wasn’t the brightest bulb of the bunch, was he?” Arthur said to Merlin after he’d ended his conversation with the maintenance man. “Poor chap.”

Merlin swallowed and nodded dumbly. Arthur seemed to be chattering on normally; apparently Merlin’s little inner mental breakdown wasn’t obvious.

“Looks like we have a bit of a wait before we get out of here,” Arthur said as he finally let go of Merlin’s hand, sat down on the floor and stretched his legs out in front of him. “Hope you’re not claustrophobic.”

Merlin shook his head and managed a, “No, not claustrophobic.”

“Well thank God for that.” Arthur smiled up at him. God he had a gorgeous mouth. “Although now you’re stuck with me, probably the last place you want to be.”

Arthur was obviously trying for lightness but his voice carried a sadness that made Merlin foolishly open his mouth.

“It’s the only place I want to be, that’s the problem.”

Arthur looked up at Merlin in confusion. “But you said -.”

“I know what I said, and clearly I’m an idiot,” Merlin said as he sat down on the other side of the lift across from Arthur. The lift afforded them little space but Merlin was trying his damnedest not to crawl into Arthur’s lap and help himself to his mouth. “And a liar.”

“Why would you lie?” Arthur asked. “If you felt the same way - like I did - why would you lie about it?”

“Because I’m an awful person.”

“You’re not making any sense at all, Merlin. It’s like you’re starting in the middle of a story and I’m absolutely lost. I was lost the other night at the gallery too, you were nattering on then as well. Something about Elena -? Although what she has to do with any of this between us I don’t know.”

Merlin frowned. “You don’t know? Honestly?”

“What should I know? I saw you that night and wanted you. My insides twisted up for want of you, if I’m being perfectly honest and laying it all out there. It scared the hell out of me, the intensity of it. That sort of thing has never happened to me before. All I could think about was kissing you, and then I did, and it was crazy and perfect and what has that to do with Elena?”

“Oh my God, you -,” Merlin stuttered as he ran his fingers through his hair. “You twat. You’re supposed to be -. God. _I’m_ supposed to be her friend and we’re both utter cocks.”

Merlin knew he sounded a bit hysterical but he was just so damn angry--at Arthur for being a cheating, oblivious prick, and at himself for not exactly caring because Arthur was so damn close and smelled so damn good and every cell of magic inside Merlin was trying to crawl out of him and into Arthur.

“I’m Ellie’s friend as well,” Arthur insisted, clearly not understanding Merlin’s point. “Would you please just make sense? What am I supposed to be?”

“Her boyfriend, you pillock,” Merlin said, his arm involuntarily waving around in Arthur’s direction. “And clearly you don’t care enough about her to even bother to remember that fact, you just go around being you. With your face. And your hands. And kissing unsuspecting idiots that make the mistake of falling arse over tit for you even though you’re a bastard; a cheating, lying bastard that cheats and lies.”

Merlin was shouting by the end of his spectacularly awful speech, but he couldn’t stop himself, and Arthur was just sitting there with an amused expression on his face waiting him out. Like he was a two year old having a fit and Arthur was humoring him and that just made Merlin want to kick Arthur in the shin.

“Are you done?” Arthur calmly asked once Merlin stopped shouting and waving his arm at him.

“For now,” Merlin answered petulantly as he crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Arthur mulishly. “Though you needn’t look so smug and unconcerned about being a horrible twat, it’s likely to set me off again.”

Arthur nodded. “Fair enough.”

“And quit being so calm.” Merlin pointed a finger at him. “And amused. This isn’t amusing.”

“If it were serious, no, it wouldn’t be amusing. Far from it.” Arthur said. “I wouldn’t hurt Elena for the world.”

“Because she’s got those Bambi eyes. And is all sweet and fumbling and hurting her would be like kicking a kitten, or, or shitting on a rainbow.” Merlin ended triumphantly. God, he was such an idiot.

Arthur burst out laughing. “Shitting on a rainbow, Merlin? Honestly?”

“So it wasn’t my best, but you’re still cheating on your girlfriend and that’s far worse than my crap analogies.”

“Literally.” Arthur smiled at him.

“Literally? What?”

“Crap analogies. Shitting on rainbows. Keep up, Merlin.”

“Whatever. Quit avoiding my outrage and the fact that you’re Elena’s boyfriend and you’ve had your tongue in my mouth and you’ve sent me a million and one really really lovely stalkerish texts.”

“Except I’m not,” Arthur said quietly.

“You’re not what?”

“Elena’s boyfriend.”

Merlin opened his mouth but snapped it shut again when he realized he had nothing to say to that.

“Although I can’t deny the tongue in your mouth even if it outraged you, or the stalkerish texts, though I’m glad you found those lovely - apparently in a creepy way - but still lovely so that’s a plus.”

“You’re not Elena’s boyfriend?”

Arthur shook his head. “Not currently, no. Though we have dated in the past.”

Merlin’s mind was reeling. Why had Elena said they were together? And why was Arthur operating under the assumption they weren’t? And why was no one coming to fix the flipping bloody lift, because Merlin was obviously too worked up to manage it himself, so he could run away and hyperventilate in peace?

“But she said -.”

“In the past, Merlin. We’re not together now, we’re just mates. Best mates, but still just mates.”

“She said her father -. And your father -.”

“Want us to get married, yes, but I don’t really think that’s the best thing for either one of us. And it doesn’t make us a couple either. They may both think they run the world, but even they can’t will us together from the sheer force of their egos alone.”

Merlin just stared at Arthur. He couldn’t properly process the situation.

“Elena’s a better daughter than I am a son,” Arthur continued. “I know she’d marry me, to please him. She always wants to please everyone, even to the detriment of her own happiness. She’s the most amazing person I know, with the biggest heart, but I’m not the one for her. I love her, but not in the right way. Elena deserves a big love. A big, grand, heart leaping out of her chest love, and I’m not it.”

“Oh God, I knew it,” Merlin said as he let his head drop back against the wall of the lift.

“Knew what?”

“That you were better than all of that awful stuff. I could see it. Glowing all around you.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Arthur asked, clearly confused. “Because the tone of your voice makes it sound like a bad thing.”

“No, not a bad thing,” Merlin said.

He willed all of his magic to finally pay attention to him and get the damned lift moving again. He had to get out of there and give himself time to think. Merlin felt a stirring inside him right before the lift shuddered back into motion just as normally as could be, as if nothing had happened. Merlin saw a pleased, if confused, smile pass over Arthur’s face at the sudden and unexpected movement of the lift. Merlin sighed and got to his feet when the lift slowed to a stop on the proper floor and the doors opened. Before he walked through them like the coward he knew he was being he looked back at Arthur.

“Not a bad thing. Just a really complicated thing.”

~*~

Elena had found herself smiling stupidly at random moments of the day ever since she’d left Gwaine’s flat the day before. They’d talked for hours, about everything and nothing, and she’d remember something he’d said or something he’d teased her about and she’d smile to herself.

It was getting to the point where people kept asking her what she was thinking about, what had put such a look on her face, and she felt foolish saying, _‘oh, this amazing guy I just met and have talked to a total of twice in my life but want to keep talking to for the rest of it.’_ And that little bit there at the end, wanting to keep talking to Gwaine forever, was the part that was filling her with equal measures of anxiety and guilt, and bursting happiness.

She was up and down. One minute she worried about what she’d say to Arthur, if he ever asked, which she wasn’t sure he would, and the next minute she’d feel like running down the street laughing like a madwoman simply because she could.

Merlin’s voicemail that morning had actually surprised her. She’d forgotten in that moment that she’d even gone to him in the first place. She’d forgotten about _Arthur_ , and her father and his father, and all of their plans. She’d absolutely and completely forgotten it all because she’d been thinking about Gwaine’s laugh and the fact that he had crap taste in football teams.

Once she’d realized what she’d done a burning hot wire of guilt wound its way through her. She’d had all of these plans and was doing crazy things, like hiring a matchmaker of all things, to make the plans successful and she’d forgotten every one of them. All for a brilliant laugh and an idiot who supported West Ham.

She was wallowing in her guilt, i.e. eating chocolate in her pyjamas and watching _The Only Way is Essex_ , when she heard someone pounding on her door. She was just about to get up and answer it when a key rattled in the door before it swung open and Arthur barged through.

“El, what on earth are you doing telling Merlin I’m your boyfriend?” he said, clearly exasperated.

“Because you are?” Elena said quietly as she put on her most innocent face.

“No, not the face. It won’t work,” Arthur said. “You lied to him. Why would you do that?”

“I didn’t lie,” Elena insisted. “You’re my friend, and a boy, therefore a boyfriend and ergo I didn’t lie.”

“ _Ellie_ ,” Arthur said, his voice bordering on frustration and laughter. “You’d make a crap solicitor.”

Elena laughed. “I know, wouldn’t I just?”

Arthur looked like he was about to laugh too but then he cleared his throat and pointed a finger at her.

“Not the point.”

“What was the point again?” Elena knew she was pushing it.

“You flat out lied. You never lie.”

Elena flopped back against the settee in defeat and Arthur sat down beside her.

“I know,” she said as she crossed her arms over her face. “And I felt horrible about it, but I really wanted Merlin to help me so I might have told just a teeny, tiny, itsy-bitsy white lie.”

“You call telling someone that we’re dating a teeny, tiny, itsy-bitsy white lie? That’s more like rewriting reality. And what are you even talking about, Merlin helping you? Helping you do what?”

Elena dropped her arms back into her lap and looked at Arthur with one eye closed and her face scrunched up waiting for the shouting when she answered quietly, “Helping us get married.”

“He’s what?” Arthur shouted.

“Oh my God, don’t yell alright,” Elena said as she waved her arms at Arthur and grabbed at his hands. “Just listen to me, please, before you have a freakout, okay?”

“How could I not have a freakout, El?” Arthur shouted again before he just started saying random words in complete and utter confusion. “Merlin. And marriage. You. _You_.”

“I know.” Elena cringed. “I’m awful.”

“I want to throw you in the Thames right now.”

“I know, I know. But just listen, there’s a reason for what I’m doing.”

“If it’s our fathers, then just stop right there,” Arthur said. “We’ve never let them dictate our lives before so why are you even considering their crazy talk?”

“But they’re our fathers,” Elena insisted.

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean they can steer the course of our lives.”

“I know that, and it isn’t just them. We were good together once. Didn’t you think so?”

“Of course I did, we never would have made it as long as we did if I didn’t, but we’re not together anymore.”

“But why should that mean we’re not meant to be together? People go through all kinds of ups and downs in their relationships. You’re the best man I know, I can’t imagine finding anyone better than you. We get along so well and I feel safe with you because I know we could make a life together if you’d only give us a chance. Making our fathers happy is only an extra bonus.”

“Don’t you want more than safe, El?” Arthur asked. “I don’t disagree that we could be happy together, that we’d be good, but that’s all we’d be. Good. Don’t you want great?”

Elena looked at Arthur and saw all the things that made her love him--all those things she knew about him that no one else did--and it made her feel warm inside to know she was the one who held onto those secret parts of him. She felt secure in the fact that she’d always have a home with him. But then she thought about Gwaine; how he made her feel as if she were just on the edge of something really, really amazing and if she’d just have the bollocks to take that last step forward she’d be overwhelmed and exhilarated and bursting with joy.

Or maybe she’d just fall off the edge and end up broken.

It was too much to take, _Gwaine_ seemed too much to take in that moment, so instead of saying, yes, she wanted something great - something fucking spectacular - she took Arthur’s hand in her own.

“I want you,” she said.

“Elena,” Arthur whispered, then sighed in resignation, and Elena watched his shoulders droop in that way he had when he’d decided to do what he thought was the right thing and what was expected of him even if, deep down, it was the last thing he wanted to do.

It broke Elena’s heart. And she almost said, _‘no, no, I take it all back,’_ but she just couldn’t make herself do it. Arthur had been her choice from the beginning, she’d made her decision, and she wasn’t going to go back on it now.

Elena leaned in and kissed Arthur’s cheek.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, El.” Arthur looked up at her. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

Elena bit her bottom lip and nodded.

“Okay. Okay,” Arthur sighed. “We’ll talk about it, and we’ll figure something out.”

Elena closed her eyes and thought it really shouldn’t be this hard.

~*~

After Arthur left, hours later, Elena was drained but resolved. She was going to stick to her decision, the one that had sent her to Merlin in the first place. She had been so sure of herself just a week ago and after talking to Arthur she was sure again.

At least that was what she was telling herself.

It felt strange, ignoring the churning in her stomach telling her something wasn’t right. She usually listened to those feelings whenever she had them; they were what so often got her in trouble, got her laughed at, tut-tutted at, got her told she was being silly and flighty and very very Elena-y. And she never could figure out what was wrong with being Elena-y. She loved being Elena-y.

She closed her eyes and told herself that that was why Arthur was the right choice, the right path for her--he’d always loved her being Elena-y. He always encouraged what others thought silly or naive. He was right for her. He was.

She jumped when her mobile vibrated. Bollocks, she’d never called Merlin back.

She picked up the mobile and checked the screen. Merlin.

_where r u? something wrong. need to talk._

Elena took a deep breath and texted him back that she’d pop round to his place tomorrow if he was free and they could talk. She’d get it all sorted out, she’d tell Merlin his services were still needed, it was all just a mix-up, and everything would work out brilliantly.

Everything would be _fine_.

~*~

“You said Arthur was your boyfriend,” Merlin said in lieu of a hello to Elena when he opened the door to her.

“I know. I know I know I know,” Elena said as she ducked past Merlin and slipped into his flat.

“Why would you do that?”

“Because we were as good as, and I didn’t think it’d matter in the long run. I figured it would all work out.”

“But I told you that my magic doesn’t work on couples who aren’t actually together. I can’t make a relationship out of nothing, I can’t force love.”

“You wouldn’t be forcing love, Arthur and I love each other,” Elena said.

“Yes, I know that, but not in the way you need to love one another.”

“Are you saying it won’t work?”

Merlin sighed. “I told you, Elena, I can’t force someone to feel something he doesn’t already feel. I only help things along a little.”

“But it would work, if Arthur wanted it too?” Elena asked as she stepped towards Merlin and took his hands. “If we both wanted the same thing?”

“You don’t want the same thing, though, Arthur wants m- ,” Merlin stopped himself from saying, _‘me, he wants_ me _...and I want him.’_

“Arthur does want it,” Elena said. “We’ve talked. A lot, actually, and he agreed. He wants this, he does.”

“Arthur wants this?” Merlin asked, and he was surprised he didn’t choke on the words.

Elena nodded and whispered, “Yes.”

Merlin felt his knees buckle and he let himself drop down onto the settee as he pressed his hand to the center of his chest. His heart. God. He wondered if this was the way a heart attack felt because he couldn’t breathe and his chest ached. All of this time he’d been telling himself that he had to let Arthur go, that he was doing the right thing to step away, but then he’d foolishly let himself hope when Arthur had told him he and Elena weren’t together.

He had hoped, and he had wanted, and he’d thought about what it would be like to love in that enormous, forever kind of way, and now that was all gone.

“Merlin -.” Elena touched his shoulder as she sat down beside him.

“I’m fine. I’m fine -,” Merlin’s voice did choke up then and no more words came out.

He was so stupid. So damn stupid.

“Do you need a drink of water?” Elena’s voice came through the fog of his thoughts, interrupting them. “Do you need anything?”

Merlin shook his head no.

“Everything will be okay,” Elena seemed to be saying it more as a reassurance to herself than to Merlin. “Everything will be just fine.”

 _Fine_ , Merlin thought, such a sad, useless word.

~*~

Elena had left Merlin’s after failing to get a proper conversation out of him. She’d left him a glass of water and patted his hand before making a run for it.

And she was disappointed, plain and simple. She’d gone to Merlin in hopes of having his encouragement to back her up on her decision. She thought he would have supported her and been happy for her, but instead he’d only seemed upset and disappointed in her. She didn’t know what she could have done to have made him feel that way. He’d seemed so positive about her and Arthur up until then.

Sure, she’d told a little bit of a fib, but she knew Arthur would come around once they’d talked. She had only been moving things along by going to Merlin first. It had nothing to do with being terrified that maybe she was making the wrong choice and that Arthur would end up talking her out of it. Merlin had been so enthusiastic too, and he had seemed to really like Arthur, and Arthur him. Elena had been so happy when Arthur had asked her for Merlin’s mobile number, she’d thought only good things could come from a friendship between the two of them. From the moment she’d met Merlin she’d felt that he and Arthur would get along a treat, she had instantly felt they suited one another for some reason.

But now that Merlin was acting strangely and Elena was feeling the absence of his enthusiasm, it made her doubtful again, and just when she’d been sure of herself.

“Hey you.”

Gwaine’s voice stopped Elena in her tracks. She was halfway to the lift when his voice interrupted the turmoil of her thoughts and made her stomach drop.

Bloody fantastic.

“Seeing Merlin about a boy again?”

Elena nodded and turned to look over her shoulder.

“You don’t look it.”

“Thanks ever so.” Elena frowned.

“I’m just saying, usually the people coming out of that flat look like they’re floating on air. You look like you’d sink to the bottom of the Thames.”

Elena threw her hands up in the air and let them flop back down against her hips.

“Merlin was being strange. He seemed disappointed I had fixed things with Arthur and now I don’t know what to think. I thought he’d be happy for me, everything is still on, that should make him happy, right? I was counting on him to be excited for me. I dunno what I’m saying,” Elena struggled for words. “I guess I was just counting on him.”

“That doesn’t sound like Merlin,” Gwaine said as he stepped closer to Elena. “He’s usually fairly ridiculous where love’s concerned.”

“I know!” Elena nearly shouted at Gwaine. “That’s what I’m saying. I was hoping for that, I needed that -.”

“Because you fixed things with Arthur?” Gwaine prodded, and it sounded to Elena’s ears like he was disappointed in her as well. “What needed to be fixed with Arthur?”

“Well,” Elena confessed, “I might have told a little white lie, about us actually dating.”

“You mean you weren’t dating?”

“No?” Elena’s voice raised at the end like she wasn’t sure of the answer herself. “Well, not at the time, no, but we had been in the past, and we are now - we talked, that’s what I was telling Merlin about - and now everything’s fine, so why can’t people be happy for me?”

Elena knew she sounded crazy, but she was just so damned disappointed and Gwaine was looking at her with those eyes of his that made her want to tell him every crazy thought in her head and the words just kind of spilled out of their own accord.

Gwaine reached out and to take Elena’s hand and she let him.

“Maybe he’s not so sure everything is fine,” he said.

“Why wouldn’t he be sure?”

“Because you don’t seem all that sure yourself.”

“I’m sure! I’m one hundred percent sure. I couldn’t be surer.”

Elena knew that every time she said the word ‘sure,’ she sounded less and less like she actually was.

Gwaine looked at her and gave her hand a squeeze.

“I was just on my way to see a film, I think you should come with me.”

“I’m not in the mood right now,” Elena said unhappily.

“They’re showing a screening of _The Princess Bride_ , how could you not be in the mood for that?” Gwaine smiled at her. “Come on; rhyming giants, the six-fingered man, Inigo Montoya, _inconceivable_ , do I really need to go on?”

“Gwaine,” Elena sighed, “I’m really not in the mood for a film.”

“Have fun storming the castle,” Gwaine said. “Come on, how can you turn that down?”

Elena felt a smile tugging at her mouth. God, she really did just want to sit in a dark, cool cinema and eat and eat and eat and forget about everything in her life in favour of Westley and Buttercup.

“Fine,” she said, pretending like it was an absolute drudgery on her part. “But you need to buy me an extra large popcorn and at least three different kinds of sweets. And orange pop.”

Gwaine’s smile was brilliant and Elena’s heart felt a thousand times lighter. He held out his elbow to her and she hooked her arm through it.

“As you wish,” he said.

~*~

Merlin looked at his mobile when it rang and debated with himself over whether or not he should answer it.

It was Arthur.

And Merlin didn’t know what on earth he could say to him at the moment that wouldn’t break his heart, or end in a shouting match with Arthur. He was torn between being angry as hell and being full of a heavy, aching sadness. He felt Arthur had given up on them before they’d even had a chance to become a _them_. For that single day Elena had been out of the picture. After Arthur had told Merlin that he and Elena weren’t meant to be together, Merlin had imagined all the things he and Arthur could become.

It had been wonderful.

And he could picture it all so easily, he could imagine what every day of his life would be like with Arthur. Then Elena came walking through his door and ruined it all, and he hadn’t even been able to be angry with her. She had no idea what was going on between Arthur and himself, all she knew was that he was supposed to be helping her get her wedding, her happily ever after. Merlin had wanted to stop her, to apologize, as she’d left the day before because she was clearly confused and upset at his reaction to her news. But he’d been so painfully disappointed himself that he hadn't been able to muster up the lies to make her feel okay.

Merlin took a deep breath and answered Arthur’s call.

“Don’t hang up on me,” Arthur said right away.

“Why would I hang up on you? I answered your call, didn’t I?”

Merlin heard Arthur sigh on the other end of the line.

“I know, but I’ve been thinking about how much you must hate me ever since El called to tell me she’d been to see you.”

Merlin didn’t say anything to that and a moment of silence stretched awkward and painful between them.

“I’m so sorry, Merlin. I’m so damn sorry,” Arthur whispered.

“Why?” Merlin asked. “Could you at least just tell me why?”

“I did it for Elena,” Arthur answered. “And I know that should be an obvious answer, and a stupid one as well seeing as how only a couple of days ago I was telling you how insane you made me feel and a few days before that I was kissing you and now I just promised to marry someone else. But you don’t know how much she’s done for me, Merlin. You just don’t know.”

“Tell me then.”

“She’s been by my side nearly every day of my life and every heartbreak I’ve ever known she made better. My mother died when I was seventeen and I went to a really awful place, became a totally different person, and El pulled me back from the edge. I owe her. I owe her so much.”

Merlin closed his eyes and clutched the phone in his hand. God, Arthur. That stupid, selfless, loyal bastard. Who did something like that? Who altered their own life and happiness to pay back an imagined debt?

“Arthur,” Merlin sighed. “You stupid bastard.”

“I know. I’m sorry, Merlin, you’ve no idea. When I think about you -.” Arthur stopped himself from saying more and Merlin tried to stop himself from asking for more.

They both lapsed into silence once again. Merlin had no idea how long they sat there listening to each other breathe, but it was so comfortable, so reassuring, knowing that Arthur was on the other side of the phone line and that if only Merlin asked he could hear Arthur’s voice.

“Merlin,” Arthur finally said, “can you say something, please? I can hear you thinking.”

Merlin smiled despite himself.

“You can hear no such thing.”

“I can, the phone line is buzzing with static.”

“Shut up,” Merlin said fondly.

“Talk to me,” Arthur said.

“It’s stupid and impossible.”

“I don’t care, I’ll make it possible.”

Merlin wanted to tell Arthur not to make promises he couldn’t keep because what he wanted was to ask Arthur to run away with him and never look back, he wanted to tell Arthur that they were supposed to have a chance, they were supposed to be great together.

Make that possible, Merlin thought. Please.

“I know I shouldn’t ask this,” Merlin said instead, “but will you do one thing for me?”

“Yes,” Arthur nearly spoke over Merlin’s words, so quick was he to agree.

“Go out with me? Just once before I go through with everything for Elena?”

“Merlin, I -.”

“Just so I know what it’s like. For real,” Merlin rushed to cut Arthur off before he could go back on his promise and say no.

“You didn’t let me finish,” Arthur said.

“Because you were going to say what an awful, horrific idea it was and then say no to me.”

“It’s the worst idea ever, I agree,” Arthur said, “but you didn’t let me ask when and where?”

“Arthur,” Merlin sighed in relief.

“When and where?” he repeated.

“I don’t know. I don’t care. I just want to be somewhere I can talk to you and look at you and just -. Just be with you, Arthur.”

“I know a great coffee shop.”

Merlin smiled. “So you’ve told me.”

“Tomorrow morning? I’ll take the day off and we’ll spend the entire day together.”

Merlin closed his eyes at the thought of an entire day spent with Arthur.

“The entire day,” he said. “It’s official now, you’ve promised.”

“I have.”

“I’m going to hold onto you the whole time, I won’t let you go.”

“Make sure you don’t,” Arthur said.

~*~

“So. Elena and Arthur, huh? How’s that going?” Gwaine asked as he helped himself to more eggs and bacon after having wandered over to Merlin’s for breakfast.

“Smashingly,” Merlin said sarcastically as he did nothing but push his food around on his plate.

“I can hear the enthusiasm in your voice, it’s nearly palpable.”

“Well that’s the tone of voice you get when I’ve contracted myself to matchmake the man I’m pretty sure I’m in love with to someone else.”

Gwaine set down his fork and looked at Merlin, who would’ve laughed at his dumbfounded face if he weren’t in such a foul mood himself.

“You think you’re in love with Arthur?” Gwaine asked.

“Yep.” Merlin nodded, then sat forward in his chair and pointed his fork at Gwaine. “In fact, no, scratch that, I don’t think I’m in love with him, I _know_ I’m in love with him. He kissed me and we made actual, literal sparks fly and I’ve basically thought about him every minute of every day since. So, yeah, I’m in love with the arsehole.”

“He kissed you?”

“You say that with such surprise,” Merlin frowned, “is it really so hard to believe someone would want to kiss me?”

Gwaine rolled his eyes. “Don’t get a strop on, missy, I was just surprised overall, cos you never said anything, not because I don’t think hot guys would want to kiss you.”

“Ugh,” Merlin groaned and dropped his head onto the table. “This entire situation is driving me insane. Elena’s being stupid, Arthur’s being stupid, I’m being stupid, it’s one big, fat stupid extravaganza.”

“Well I know you really upset Elena yesterday,” Gwaine said.

“How do you know that?” Merlin asked as he looked up from the table at him.

“I ran into her in the hallway on my way out. We went to see a film together.”

“You went to see a film? Just like that?” Merlin sat up and asked. “You do know she’s taken, right?”

“And you thought Arthur was taken when you kissed him and thought filthy thoughts about him so pot, kettle, and you can just shut it.”

“Why are you even asking me about Arthur and Elena if you obviously know the whole story?”

“I’m only getting bits and pieces. Elena told me her side, which obviously didn’t include your and Arthur’s bit of tongue dancing, and now I’m learning about the naughty bits from you. I’ve an inquisitive mind, you know.”

“You have the nosy mind of an eighty year old busybody.”

Gwaine shrugged. “It gets the job done.”

“You’re pathetic.”

“Says the man pining over someone else’s almost-fiance.”

“I can’t help it,” Merlin whined. “We’re destined, why am I the only one who sees that?”

“Okay, first we need to dial down the drama,” Gwaine said as he reached over to pat Merlin on the back. “And second, you need to call off your agreement with Elena.”

“But I can’t, I already deposited the first half of the payment. And spent it as well,” Merlin added before Gwaine could tell him to give it back. “Do you have any idea how close I was to losing this flat? I was desperate.”

“Merlin,” Gwaine sighed. “Why’d you let it get so bad without telling me? You know I could have loaned you whatever you needed.”

“I don’t like owing people money.”

“I’m not people, I’m your mate. There’s a big difference.”

“You’re right about that,” Merlin said as he got up to clear away his plate. “It makes it worse. I don’t want to be a burden to people I love.”

“You’re hardly a burden.”

“Yeah, well, I’d feel like one.”

Gwaine didn’t respond to Merlin’s statement, he simply watched him obsessively clean the kitchen counters. And that could only spell trouble, Merlin was a compulsive cleaner when he was worried. Gwaine usually found it rather cute and often carefully steered Merlin across the hall and into his own flat so he could have at it. Gwaine had lost count of the number of times Merlin had cleaned his flat for him and then said, _‘hey, how’d I get in here?’_ as he threw rubbish bags at Gwaine’s head.

It was always a good time. But this? This was different and Gwaine needed to suss out what was going on with Merlin. He got up and walked over to the counter so he could hover over Merlin to get him to talk.

“Finish the story,” Gwaine told him.

“I did.”

“Hm. No. I don’t think you did.”

Merlin gave Gwaine the evil eye, but told him the rest anyway.

“I might have asked Arthur out on a date,” he mumbled.

“Merlin!” Gwaine hollered at him.

“Just one,” Merlin rushed to add.

“Which is one too many. He’s basically engaged. To be married. To someone other than you.”

“Thanks for the succinct and unnecessary recap of current events.”

“Well. It seemed like you needed it repeated,” Gwaine said. “What the fuck were you thinking, Merlin?”

Merlin shrugged, and raised his hands in the air. “Not much, obviously,” he said, “other than about Arthur and having just one bloody date with the man who’s going to rip all my guts out when he leaves me.”

Merlin’s shoulders fell and he seemed to collapse in on himself. Gwaine felt awful for goading him and reached out to pull him into a hug.

“Aw, mate, why are you doing this to yourself?”

Merlin’s arms came around Gwaine’s waist and held on tightly.

“Because I love him,” he whispered into Gwaine’s shoulder. “And I want just one day with him.”

Gwaine closed his eyes and thought of Elena and how he couldn’t really blame Merlin for wanting one day, and he realized he wanted the same thing with her.

He squeezed Merlin more tightly. For good measure.

~*~

Merlin had to stop himself from showing up at the coffee shop right when it opened. He was up the entire night, too filled with excitement and anxiety and a huge dose of _‘what the hell am I doing?’_ to sleep properly, so he was ready to run out the door and be waiting on the shop’s doorstep when they opened. He only just managed to hold off until nine, which was the time Arthur suggested they meet.

Well, maybe half past eight, but that was still better than five in the bloody morning.

Even though Merlin was half an hour early, when he walked in the door Arthur was already waiting for him at a corner table. When he saw Merlin he smiled and it was like a beacon calling to him, drawing him to Arthur’s side.

Arthur stood and reached out for him when he was close enough to touch.

“You’re gorgeous in the morning,” Arthur said as he touched his fingers to the curve of Merlin’s jaw.

“Liar.” Merlin smiled as he twined his fingers with Arthur’s. “I’ve been awake all night, I look awful.”

“Well, then, it suits you. You should always stay up all night.”

“Yeah, I’ll do that,” Merlin said, completely distracted by how tightly Arthur was holding onto him. “Sounds totally sensible.”

Arthur nodded and Merlin could tell he wasn’t paying a bit of attention to what he’d just said, all he was doing was staring at Merlin like he couldn’t believe he was standing in front of him. It sent shivers down Merlin’s spine because the more he thought about it the more he realized that was how Arthur _always_ looked at him--like he was some sort of bloody miracle standing right there in front of him. Being the focus of such attention did things to Merlin’s insides and he could feel his magic kicking up into a simmering frenzy.

“I’ve been here since seven,” Arthur confessed.

“I should have come earlier too,” Merlin said. “I was pacing and willing the time to pass faster.”

“I want to make a deal with you,” Arthur said as he sat down and pulled on Merlin’s hand to urge him to sit beside him. When Merlin did Arthur took both of his hands in his own and held them in his lap. “Tonight, after we’ve spent hours and hours with one another, I’ll explain why I did what I did and I’ll apologize and beg forgiveness, but for now can we forget we’re anything other than the two of us here together?”

“We can forget,” Merlin whispered. “For hours and hours.”

~*~

Gwaine had spent a rather sleepless night as well. He’d been kept up thinking about Merlin and Arthur and their last hurrah of a date. He couldn’t decide if it was romantic or the worst idea ever conceived, and in both cases he thought about Elena, about how he’d like to have the same thing with her whether or not it was romantic or the stupidest thing ever. It didn’t matter to him, the only thought running through his head was that either way he’d get to see Elena again.

So he called her. And when she’d said yes, rather breathless and half laughing like she didn’t quite know which end was up, he’d laughed too and came to the decision that crazy or not it was the only thing he could have done.

When he heard Merlin leaving his flat rather early the next morning he’d called Elena back, like it was some sort of covert affair and it made him feel like an idiot and like he was treating Elena horribly, like some dirty little secret, but she’d sounded so happy to hear his voice that he pushed all those thoughts out of his head. They talked about what they wanted to do and Elena said she’d just come to him because it didn’t really matter what they did, did it? All she wanted was to see him.

Gwaine was hard-pressed to say otherwise.

The Elena that greeted him on the other side of his door not long after they’d hung up was a disheveled mess. She looked like she’d dashed out the door without a second thought; she was wearing jeans, an old faded t-shirt and ratty cardigan that looked five sizes too large for her, and her hair was a wild mass on top of her head, strands flying loose and every which way. She was also wide-eyed and flushed pink with either the cold of the morning or excitement, Gwaine couldn’t tell, and she was hands down the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. Totally in the moment and sexy as hell.

She flung herself into his arms and he held onto her as her feet left the floor. She was so overwhelming to him, larger than life in his eyes, that he forgot what a tiny, little thing she actually was.

“I’m so glad you called me,” she whispered in his ear. “I missed you.”

“Missed you too,” he said into the curve of her neck as he held her more tightly and didn’t let her feet touch the ground.

~*~

Arthur and Merlin moved their date from the coffee shop to a nearby park when they kept getting the stink-eye from the obviously disgruntled employee behind the counter.

Merlin had just smiled in amusement every time she’d wander by and wash the tables around them in a very pointed way as she’d ask sweetly if she could, _‘get them anything else?’_ and he had wondered if she worked on a commission or something. Arthur had rolled his eyes at Merlin and took his hand to pull him out of his chair and out the door.

Merlin burst out laughing when she called out to them to, _‘have a nice day!’_ in the most arsed off way as the door jingled closed behind them.

“I bet if we’d ordered something she’d have spit in it.” Merlin laughed.

Arthur just shook his head and ended up laughing right along with Merlin.

“Good God, it’s like we personally affronted her by being there. Is she not aware of what people do in coffee shops?”

Merlin shrugged and grinned as he bumped his shoulder into Arthur’s and held Arthur’s hand to his chest.

“Where to next, Pendragon?”

“There’s a park with hopefully less stringent loitering laws nearby.”

“Or at least with less disgruntled employees,” Merlin said.

“Here’s hoping.”

They’d collapsed under a tree in an out of the way spot--lying on their backs, hands clasped tightly between them, and looking up through the leaves and branches of the tree.

They were silent for a long while, Arthur’s thumb gently, rhythmically, brushing against Merlin’s hand.

“Lying here beside you,” Merlin’s voice broke their quiet, “not saying anything at all is the closest to home I’ve ever felt.”

Arthur didn’t answer right away but took a moment before he said, “Should we live under this tree forever?”

“Like little garden gnomes?” Merlin looked over at Arthur and smiled.

“Yes, like little garden gnomes.” Arthur laughed at him.

“Well then, yes, I think we should. You’d look lovely with a big long white beard and a giant belly.”

“I’ve always thought so.”

Merlin hummed in contented amusement and shifted closer to Arthur so he could curl into his side and lay his head on Arthur’s shoulder. He wanted to whisper to him, _’I love you. Don’t ever change,’_ but he didn’t know if he could get the words out without choking on regret.

“What made you decide to run the non-profit branch of the company?” Merlin asked instead, hoping that hearing something matter-of-fact would take his mind away from all the things he couldn’t have.

“It was Morgana’s idea, actually. She was the one who started really working hard to make the non-profit division more than just a nice aside our father could claim to investors and the like.”

“She talked you into it then?”

“It didn’t take much convincing,” Arthur said. “I never wanted my father’s life. I respect and admire him, but I don’t want that, so this was a compromise that I could live with. I’m not always sure he can live with it though.”

“What did you want to do?” Merlin asked.

“I wanted to move to Australia and be a surf God.”

It took Merlin a second before Arthur’s statement sunk in and he burst out in a loud snort of laughter against Arthur’s chest as he pressed his face into him to try to muffle the sound.

“I’m completely serious, Merlin, you wound me.”

Merlin propped himself up on his elbow and looked down into Arthur’s face.

“I’m sure you are.” He smiled and brushed Arthur’s hair across his forehead. “I can see it.”

“Liar.” Arthur laughed.

“You can be anything you want to be, Arthur, if you just believe in yourself.”

Arthur looked at Merlin fondly and reached up to touch his mouth. Merlin's lips hummed under the touch.

“You’re ridiculous,” Arthur said.

“Should I start calling you The Big Kahuna?”

“Probably, since I like to live my life like it’s a 1960s American surf film.”

Merlin laughed again and couldn’t stop himself from leaning down and kissing Arthur. It was a small kiss, just a brush of lips, but it was enough and Merlin felt the breeze pick up around them as it rustled through the leaves of the tree above. Arthur looked up at Merlin and he ached to see the naked love in Arthur’s eyes. He didn’t know if it made it easier or harder to know that Arthur felt the same way about him, an uncontrollable love. Arthur only moved his eyes from Merlin’s to look up at the leaves that continued to rustle.

“I always feel like I’m in the middle of this surge of energy when I’m with you,” Arthur said. “It’s like the world changes around me and I never want it to go back to the way it was.”

Merlin knew it was time then to tell Arthur about himself and why it was they even met in the first place. He pushed himself up so he was sitting at Arthur’s side, his hand resting on the center of Arthur’s chest. It was always difficult telling someone about his magic for the first time, and it was even more nerve wracking with Arthur because he mattered more than anyone else Merlin had ever told.

“That’s because it does change,” Merlin said. “Because of me.”

Arthur smiled up at him. “I know.”

Merlin shook his head. “Not in the way that you mean. You think it’s something in your head, and your heart, and that it’s only making you _think_ the world is changing, but what I’m saying is that it actually, physically, is. And I’m doing it.”

Arthur looked at him and Merlin could clearly read his face, the, _‘I’m sorry, I don’t get what you’re saying,’_ look of it.

“I’m doing this,” Merlin said as he held out his hand to Arthur, palm up, and let it fill with sparks of light, swirling little pops like fireworks all contained within the palm of his hand.

Arthur’s eyes grew wide and he quickly sat up. Merlin’s heart dropped, but then Arthur grabbed his wrist and pulled his hand closer.

“Make them red,” he said, and when Merlin did he laughed, a clear, bright sound filled with wonder. “Now blue like your eyes,” Arthur ordered and Merlin wanted to tease him that he sounded like a spoilt, demanding child but he turned them all a deep, bright blue and into the shape of a pair of eyes that blinked at Arthur, which only made him laugh again in delight.

Arthur raised Merlin’s hand above his head as he ducked to look underneath it, like Merlin was hiding some sort of mechanism under his hand and he wanted to laugh at Arthur’s reaction. It was brilliant to watch.

“You’re doing that,” Arthur said, his face beginning to flush with excitement. “How are you doing that?”

Merlin leaned in and whispered, “I’m magic.”

  


That stopped Arthur for a minute and his expressions stumbled across his face, Merlin could see every one of them: first excitement changing to confusion, then to disbelief, and lastly to wondrous amusement.

“Of course you are,” Arthur said, and the tone of his voice, the fondness and the fact that it sounded as if Arthur couldn’t imagine Merlin being anything less than magic, made Merlin surge forward and kiss him. And not the light brush of lips like he had before, but one like they’d shared the first time when Arthur had been so overcome by him that he hadn’t been able to stop himself.

Merlin closed his hand over the sparks and they disappeared, but it didn’t matter because he reached out for Arthur, for the slope of his neck to hold it in his hands, and having the feel of Arthur’s warm skin against his palms was better than any magic he’d ever felt.

Arthur kissed him back like he had that first night, his hands coming up to frame Merlin’s face, and as they both held on it was like they were drinking from one another. Arthur tasted sweet, real, like something Merlin couldn’t live without, something he’d be thirsty for forever if he ever lost him.

Merlin scrambled into Arthur’s lap, swinging his right leg over Arthur’s thighs so he was straddling his legs. Arthur gasped and let go of Merlin’s face to grasp at his hips, and Merlin wrapped an arm around Arthur’s shoulders, buried his other hand in Arthur’s hair and it was frantic and desperate, but it didn’t matter. Merlin was past the point of caring how they looked, or the fact that they should never have let it go so far, but Arthur’s fingers were digging into his hips, surely bruising them as Merlin rocked in his lap.

The magic they created swirled up around them, forming a storm of fallen leaves and twigs and grass, and it was Arthur who pulled back breathlessly, who gasped at what they’d done. Merlin sat back against Arthur’s legs and tried to pull in enough air to control his breathing and his magic both. He could feel the stares of the people who had stopped to wonder at them and the mess around them.

“I’m sorry,” Merlin gasped.

Arthur looked around, stared back at the people staring at them as they slowly started to wander off--confused and uncertain at what they’d actually seen.

“Is it always going to be like that between us?” Arthur asked.

Merlin wanted to weep at Arthur’s question, the way he phrased it like there was going to be more for them. He leaned his forehead against Arthur’s.

“It doesn’t matter though, does it?” Merlin asked in return. “This is all we have.”

Merlin felt the change in Arthur the moment he realized what he’d said and what Merlin had said; his body seemed to deflate beneath Merlin and he felt the sadness leaking into him.

“I’m sorry,” Arthur said. “I should never have -. I shouldn’t have said that. I’m so sorry.”

Merlin’s hands came back to frame Arthur’s face, his thumbs brushing against his skin, as they breathed in each other’s breaths, their foreheads still pressed together.

“It’s okay,” Merlin said. “I forget sometimes too.”

Arthur’s arms wrapped around Merlin’s waist and held him tightly and Merlin wondered if there’d ever be a time when he would be able to forget that they were perfect.

~*~

“ _The Bourne Supremacy_ is obviously the best, you’re clearly wrong,” Elena said as she grabbed a handful of popcorn.

“It’s a well established fact that the first of any movie franchise is the best, therefore, _The Bourne Identity_ is the best by default. And also because it’s the best full stop.”

Gwaine looked at Elena and enjoyed the view as she started to work herself up into another argument. He’d already gotten quite a spectacular argument out of her over football and the superiority of West Ham--why she thought he failed as a football fan was beyond him--but he was really looking forward to what was sure to be a brilliant argument over action films. Elena had weird loyalties to Matt Damon and Karl Urban that he didn’t particularly want to delve into. Apparently watching Matt and Karl fight and bloody each other was like foreplay to her, which was rather hot in Gwaine’s opinion, but he was far more interested in getting into an argument with her.

And it made him smile. Funny that, choosing a fight over a fuck, at least in his experience, but Elena was a brilliant fighter. He particularly loved how all arguments ended with a punch to the arm in her world.

“You’re mental,” Elena shouted. “And I won’t waste my time arguing with someone so clearly lacking in brain cells and common sense.”

“You’re only giving up because you have no argument. _Identity_ is the best, there’s no way around it, and now instead of sensible discourse you’ve resorted to name calling.”

“Well if that’s the case, you’re a twat too.”

Gwaine just grinned. He wasn’t about to tell her that _Supremacy_ actually was the best but was sadly lacking in Franka Potente and that was really the only basis for his argument in the first place.

Elena looked up and saw him grinning at her so she punched him in the shoulder.

“You’re the worst,” she said. “Just for that I’m changing my answer. _Ultimatum_ is the best. The third in a franchise is always the best, it’s a well known fact.”

Gwaine opened his mouth to say something sarcastic but then Elena started laughing and he was too busy looking at her to bother with the trouble of forming actual words.

Elena shifted slightly and her knees brushed against his. They were both sitting in his bed watching films and talking; more talking (and arguing) was being done than watching. As the night had worn on they got closer and closer to one another until they were lying on their sides, facing each other. Elena tucked her hands underneath her cheek so they were between her face and the pillow as she looked over at Gwaine and smiled happily.

“Like we even picked a good franchise to argue about,” she said. “The _Bourne_ films are not a good example because, let’s face it, they’re all awesome. Well, aside from the fact that there was a sad lack of Franka Potente in the last two.”

Elena’s smile grew even wider at that, knowing that she’d caught Gwaine out.

“Yes, well, come on,” Gwaine said as he waved his hand between them. “ _Run, Lola, Run._ ”

“I’m not saying anything,” Elena teased. “You won that argument.”

“What can I say? I’m brilliant at debate.”

“Shouting out _Run, Lola, Run_ as the entire basis for your argument is a genius strategy, I’ll give you that. I know it’s gotten me out of a pickle or two.”

Gwaine just snorted and stretched out his legs before curling back up so his knees could brush against Elena's again. He reached up and moved Elena’s hair away from her face--she’d taken out her ponytail and it was falling all around her face in soft, flyaway waves.

Elena’s eyes searched his and she reached out for him, her fingers at his waist pulled her even closer to him until she could lean in and kiss him. Gwaine was thankful he was already lying down because she would have knocked him down had he been standing. The kiss was hesitant, soft, and not like anything he was used to, but it was impossible to imagine it any differently, to think it wasn’t wholly perfect just as it was.

To be shocked breathless by such a small thing, it was crazy, but he’d been holding himself from kissing her for that very reason. He’d had a feeling that if he’d ever started kissing her he wouldn’t be able to stop, not for the world. The soft, full pout of her lips made him want things he couldn’t have, not if she followed through with her foolish plan to marry Arthur. He didn’t believe her for one second that she and Arthur belonged together, not when a kiss between them felt that way.

“Stay the night,” Gwaine whispered when they pulled back from the kiss just enough to separate their lips by a hair’s breadth. He dragged the back of his finger along her temple, across the smoothness of her cheek. He didn’t feel he had the strength to stop touching her.

Elena bit her bottom lip and said, “You know I can’t.”

“To sleep,” Gwaine said, “just to sleep. It’s late, I don’t want you heading home on your own.”

“So gallant,” Elena teased him, but she moved her hand from his waist to the small of his back and moved into him, her leg wrapping over his hip and her face pressed into his neck.

Gwaine wrapped his arms around her and held her as he wondered about what he could say to her, what he could do to make her see that what they had could be the beginning. The beginning of everything.

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” Elena whispered. Her voice sounded so unsure, about to break, and Gwaine didn’t know if he could take hearing her cry, but she took a deep shuddering breath and held on. “Sometimes I’m so sure, but here, with you, I’m the furthest thing from sure there is.”

Gwaine cupped the back of her head, stroked her hair. “Shouldn’t that tell you something?”

“It does,” she confessed, her breath warm against Gwaine’s neck. “And it scares me to death.”

“I’m fucking terrified,” Gwaine said. “But that just means it’s worth it.”

~*~

“Arthur, there’s more I need to tell you.”

“More than the magic?” Arthur asked as he moved his hand over Merlin’s thigh. “Because I’m still not sure I’ve got my mind wrapped around that one yet. Or have decided whether or not I’m actually high right now.”

They hadn’t known where to go after the park so they’d simply hopped a bus and took over the very back seat. Merlin wasn’t sure how many times they’d ridden the entire bus route, or what the driver must be thinking of them, but it was a chance for them to simply be together and talk with Arthur’s hand warm on Merlin’s thigh.

Merlin laughed and covered Arthur’s hand with his own.

“You’re not high, I can tell you that much.”

“I’m not entirely sure I believe you. Morgana gave me ecstasy once when I was nineteen and I spent the rest of the night seeing dancing squirrels and claiming I was breathing fire through my nose,” Arthur said as he looked over at Merlin when he laughed. “I’m serious. I also ran down the street shouting that I was tumescent with joy.”

Merlin laughed even louder at that. “I love that even when high you managed to use the word tumescent.”

“I’m very well-spoken, Merlin, you must know that,” Arthur said dryly.

Merlin turned in his seat so he was full on facing Arthur and reached out to cup his cheek.

“I adore you, Arthur Pendragon.”

Arthur simply looked at him, silent and intense, and Merlin was positive that Arthur knew he’d meant more than adore. That he’d meant he loved him, even more than he could properly say. The realization of it lit up Arthur’s eyes, made them widen with the wonder of it.

“Yes, well.” Arthur’s voice was low, filled with an emotion Merlin could easily recognize, so much so that he had to clear his throat to continue on. “I’d imagine it would be difficult not to.”

Merlin smiled at him and swept his thumb across Arthur’s cheek as he waited for what he knew in his heart would come next. Arthur turned into the touch until his lips brushed against Merlin’s thumb in a wisp of a kiss.

“You’re mad as a hatter,” Arthur said as he smiled back at Merlin. “But I adore you too.”

“Do I make you tumescent with joy?”

“Indecently so, yes,” Arthur said and Merlin laughed in delight.

“Can you imagine ever being happier than you are right now?” Merlin asked before he could stop himself.

A change came over them both then as Arthur answered with a whispered, “No, I can’t.”

A heaviness descended on them as they realized what that meant for the both of them. Merlin had known since that night in the gallery that he’d never be as happy with anyone as he’d be with Arthur. He’d be happy, in a way, yes, but never the full out expansive joyful happiness he felt deep in his heart and throughout his entire being like he did when he was with Arthur.

“I’m sorry,” Merlin said quietly.

“It’s okay,” Arthur interrupted him before he could go on. “We’ll just rewind, go back.”

Merlin nodded. “Yes, okay. Rewind.”

“Back to -,” and Arthur hesitated for a bit as he tried to readjust the moment and move back to something that wasn’t just out of reach. “Back to your magic,” he said, “and the fact that I’m most likely tripping right now because in no logical reality would we be having a conversation about magic.”

Merlin was able to smile at that. “Yes, tripping on the Metroline, that’s exactly what you’re doing.”

Arthur’s hand found its way to Merlin’s knee and he felt the warmth of it through the worn denim of his jeans. It made something settle, delicate but sure, in his stomach at the thought that Arthur seemed not to be able to stop himself from touching him.

Merlin squeezed Arthur’s hand as he gathered his thoughts. He had wanted to give Arthur a chance to let the idea of his magic sink in before he laid it all out for him: the fact that Elena had hired him, the reason they’d met in the first place, and the fact that he wasn’t going through with it, that he was going to give Elena her money back even if it took him years because there was no way he’d ever match Arthur with anyone but himself. There was no way, his magic wouldn’t have allowed it anyway so it was no use to try, even if he’d had a sudden burst of complete and absolute self-destruction and insanity overtake him.

“I’m a matchmaker,” Merlin said, best just to spit it all out and get it over with. “I use my magic to matchmake.”

Arthur looked at him incredulously for a moment, then shook his head in disbelief but smiled all the same.

“Of course you do,” he said. “You old, romantic sop.”

“Well, what else was I to do with it?” Merlin asked.

“Hm, I don’t know, let’s see. World domination perhaps?”

Merlin made a face. “Too much work.”

“Yes, I suppose so,” Arthur nodded. “Maybe start with something smaller, like putting spells on people so they act like goats. That could be fun.”

Merlin laughed. “You go from world domination to goats? Your sense of perspective is sorely lacking, Arthur.”

“But who doesn’t love goats?”

“Your logic is foolproof.”

Arthur laughed. “I know. Impressive, isn’t it?”

Merlin reached out to touch the corner of Arthur’s mouth. He traced his finger along the crease in Arthur’s cheek that appeared when he smiled. Merlin wanted to remember the feel of it.

“Elena hired me,” he said. “To matchmake the two of you. That’s why I was at the gallery the night we met. I was seeing if the two of you were compatible, if my magic would work on you both.”

The smile fell from Arthur’s face and the crease in his cheek disappeared. Merlin’s hand dropped down into his lap.

“Elena hired you? Why would she do that?”

“Why do any of my clients hire me--to make their dreams come true. They want their happily ever afters and I help give that to them.”

“By forcing people together with your magic?” Arthur asked. Merlin could hear the beginnings of anger rise up in his voice. “You do your -, your _thing_ , and all these oblivious people are pushed into lives they don’t want? That’s what you use your magic for? You have this amazing gift and you use it to play with people’s lives?”

Arthur started to rise up like he was about to leave and Merlin quickly reached out to grab his wrist and try to pull him back into his seat.

“No, Arthur, I’d never -.”

“Is that what you did to me? Did you already do whatever it is you do on me?”

“No, I haven’t done anything.”

“Is that why I agreed to marry her? You messed with my life and didn’t care at all that I loved -.” Arthur stopped himself from saying it and Merlin wanted to reach in and pull the words out of his throat so he could hear them just once, out loud.

Merlin grabbed Arthur by the forearms and pulled him towards himself; he had to have him closer so he could see, so he could look into his eyes and know he was telling him the truth.

“I haven’t done anything to you, Arthur,” Merlin said, his voice pleading that he be heard. “And I’m not going to either. I never could, not to you. I can’t send you off to someone else when all I want is to bind you to me.”

Merlin knew Arthur could see he was telling the truth, that he hadn’t done a thing to Arthur, but Arthur still looked at him in disappointment.

“But you bind other people together, you force them to be together.”

“No, I don’t,” Merlin said, his hold tightening on Arthur’s arms. “That’s not how it works, not how my magic works. If the people I’m matchmaking weren’t meant to be there’s no way my magic can bind them together. There has to be love there, I can only help along what was meant to be in the first place. Even if I had tried with you and Elena it wouldn’t have worked.”

“Are you sure, Merlin?” Arthur asked. “How do you know?”

“The couples that weren’t meant to be break apart eventually, no matter what I do, but those that were stay side by side just as they were meant to. And I know it wouldn’t have worked with you and Elena because you belong with me and nothing will ever be able to change that.”

Merlin watched as Arthur’s hands clenched into fists.

“How can you be so certain? I don’t know how -,” Arthur’s voice stuttered to a stop.

“You do know how because you’re just as certain. What has this all been about anyway if not for the certainty of what we are?”

Arthur was silent for a moment and Merlin watched him intently. He wondered if Arthur knew his every thought could be read quite clearly across his face the moment he thought them, felt them. But maybe it was only Merlin who could read him like a much loved letter, paper soft with age and the folds nearly worn through from repeated unfolding and folding. Merlin chose to believe it was only him who saw Arthur that way, Arthur was _his_ love letter.

As Merlin watched Arthur’s face, however, a change came over it that made Merlin’s stomach drop in disbelief.

“What we are, what I feel for you,” Arthur said slowly, painfully, “is that because of you? Did you do this to me?”

“No, Arthur, never -.”

“Because if it is,” Arthur interrupted him, “how could you be so cruel?”

Merlin grabbed Arthur’s face in his hands and forced him to keep his eyes on him.

“Listen to me, Arthur,” Merlin said. “What we are is only us, nothing but us. Remember what I told you, I can’t bind together two people not meant to be.”

“Maybe you saw my interest in you at the gallery that night and you used your magic to help it along.”

“Arthur.” It was all Merlin could say and he hoped that one word could draw Arthur back to him.

“Because I’ve never felt this way before. It feels like magic.”

“I haven’t either,” Merlin said. “And it’s all us.”

Merlin had been watching Arthur’s eyes, watching how they softened with each thing he said. Merlin could see the moment Arthur realized his mistake, the moment regret filled his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Arthur said. “I should never have thought that of you. Not for one minute. It’s just that -. It’s just that it’s too much, Merlin.”

Merlin stroked Arthur’s face, told him he knew, that he felt the same way.

“It’s amazing though, once you let it be, isn’t it?” Arthur asked.

Merlin smiled, nodded, and leaned in to brush a kiss across Arthur’s cheek. He trailed his hand down Arthur’s shoulder and arm until it rested against his forearm as he pressed his mouth to Arthur’s cheek and spoke quietly against his warm skin.

“When I use my magic to matchmake, when I think it will work, I touch the other person right here,” Merlin said as he lightly dragged his fingers along Arthur’s forearm. “Just a brush is all it takes and I can feel a little surge of my magic pass from my fingertips into them, a wish that they find love and be happy always.”

Arthur turned his arm over so Merlin’s hand moved to the inside of his forearm. He pulled back slowly until the palm of his hand rested underneath Merlin’s and stayed there, palm to palm.

“Whenever I felt a connection with someone,” Merlin continued, “and thought it could be more, I always felt my magic flow into them when I touched them. I always worried that I was making them feel more for me than they did, I worried that my magic inadvertently influenced people too much. I was always the one to break it off first, and I was miserable, but I was never sure. I always knew my magic wouldn’t work forever if it was never meant to, but I didn’t want to waste someone’s time when they could be finding their right someone. But with you -.”

Arthur pulled back far enough that Merlin’s lips left his cheek and he could look into Merlin’s eyes.

“But with me -?” Arthur prompted.

“But with you I never once felt my magic flow out of me, not in the way it had with everyone else. When I’m with you it’s different from anything I’ve ever felt. My magic doesn’t reach out to try to pull you in, it doesn’t flow out of me, it flows _within_ me, like this amazing storm and I’ve realized it doesn’t reach out for you because you’re already there. You’re right there in the core of me and it doesn’t need to find you because you’ve always been there, waiting.”

Arthur dropped his forehead to Merlin’s, his breath puffed across Merlin’s skin.

“God, Merlin,” he sighed, “what are we going to do?”

~*~

“Are you sure you have to go?” Gwaine asked as he leaned against the frame of his open doorway and held Elena’s hand.

“I’m sure,” Elena said. “It wouldn’t be right to stay.”

Gwaine sighed and pulled her into a tight hug.

"Remember what I told you," he said. "It's terrifying because it's worth it."

Elena pressed her face into the curve of Gwaine’s neck and breathed him in. She couldn’t rightly put into words what it felt like being in his arms other than simply admitting it felt like home.

Gwaine moved his hands to her neck and gently tipped her head back so she was looking at him.

“It’s worth it,” he repeated before leaning down to kiss her.

Elena curled her fingers around Gwaine’s hands and pulled them from her neck. She pressed her lips against the back of his right hand and then his left and held them against her chest.

“I know,” she said, the words frightening and exhilarating all at once. “I know.”

“We’ll figure this out,” Gwaine said. “We will.”

Elena nodded and stepped back, Gwaine’s hands still in her own.

“The cab’s waiting,” she said as she took another step backwards and reluctantly let go of one hand out of necessity.

“Let me walk you down.”

“No, stay here,” Elena said. “I need the lift ride down to gather up enough courage to leave completely. If you come with me I won’t be able to go.”

“Then stay.”

“Gwaine.”

Elena’s voice was soft but insistent so he let go of her hand and she gave him one last look before turning to walk down the hallway to the lift. Gwaine watched her walk away and had to hold onto the door to keep from following her.

Elena was just about to the lift when the doors opened and Merlin came bounding out of them, breathless and rushed.

“Elena!” he said as he nearly ran into her. “What are you doing here? Was I supposed to meet you?”

Gwaine saw the guilty look on Merlin’s face match the one blossoming on Elena’s as she fumbled for words and glanced back at him. Merlin’s eyes followed the course of hers and landed on Gwaine.

“Oh,” he said stupidly before the lightbulb snapped on. “ _Oh_.”

“Merlin, it’s not what you think,” Elena stuttered.

A ridiculous smile spread across Merlin’s face and Gwaine would’ve laughed at it if he wasn’t in the process of thinking about walking down to the two of them and punching Merlin in the arm for embarrassing Elena.

“Never mind that,” Merlin said happily as he reached out and gave Elena’s shoulders a squeeze. “Stay here a tick, would you?”

He didn’t give Elena a chance to respond before he walked away from her and left her stranded in the middle of the hallway, a confused expression on her face.

“You,” Merlin said as he got to Gwaine and grabbed his elbow to yank him inside his flat. “Come here.”

Gwaine had no choice but to stumble after him. Once they were back in Gwaine’s flat Merlin let go of him and turned his idiotic smile on Gwaine.

“You and Elena?” Merlin asked, eyebrow raised.

Gwaine frowned. “Maybe. So. You went out with Arthur.”

Gwaine knew he was blurting out words and sounding like a dimwit but Merlin didn’t seem to mind.

“Really?” Merlin seemed altogether too excited. “Because if it’s a _really_ really then it’s bloody brilliant. Brilliant!”

Gwaine flinched when Merlin flat out shouted the last ‘brilliant’ at him.

“Jaysus fuck, Merlin. What the hell?”

Merlin just waved his hands in front of him in an impatient way Gwaine interpreted as, _‘we’ll get to that later.’_

“Elena,” Merlin said. “Tell me the truth, be brutally honest. Are you just faffing about with her because you’re you and you can?”

“No!” Gwaine yelled at Merlin angrily. “I’m not faffing about with her.”

“Ha! Yes!” Merlin slapped his hands together and looked altogether too giddy. “You wouldn’t be in such a strop if you were being your usual dickish self.”

“Merlin, Jesus Christ, I know I can be a bit of a slapper -.”

“A slapper?” Merlin interrupted with a laugh. “Oh God, that’s rich, a whore more like, but go on.”

“A bit of a _slapper_ ,” Gwaine repeated with a significant look at Merlin. “But you can’t make fun of this, of Elena. She’s -. Fuck, she’s just -.”

Merlin gave Gwaine a light shove and his smile turned from crazy to fond.

“You really like her, don’t you, you bumbling bastard?”

Gwaine shrugged and looked away; he couldn’t face Merlin with such an admission, but he nodded in answer to his question.

Merlin shoved him again, but a bit harder. “Tell me,” he said. “Say it out loud. I need to know.”

Gwaine kept his eyes focused on a point somewhere past Merlin’s shoulder so he wouldn’t have to look at him directly.

“I don’t know how to say it,” Gwaine said as he waved his arm back towards his door and the hallway and Elena beyond it. “But I know that right now it feels like that girl out there is walking away with my heart; my chest feels hollow and it’s like I can’t properly draw in air.”

“You’re well done in, aren’t you?” Merlin asked.

Gwaine shrugged again and finally managed to look Merlin in the eyes when he said, “I guess I am.”

Merlin laughed happily and nearly tackled him to the floor in an enthusiastic hug.

“I love you, you soppy bastard,” Merlin said as he gave Gwaine a sloppy kiss on the cheek before letting him go. “Let’s go get that girl of yours and figure out this giant fuck up of a mess of ours.”

Gwaine smiled to himself and shook his head as he followed Merlin back out into the hallway where Elena was still standing, awkward and adorable with confusion. Merlin walked across the hall and started to unlock his door with one hand and waved Elena to come closer with the other.

“Come on with you now,” Merlin said to her. “We’re having an intervention.”

“An intervention?” Elena asked as she started to walk towards them.

She was just about to Merlin’s door when the lift doors opened and Arthur came barreling out of them just as flustered and breathless as Merlin had been when he’d come flying out minutes before.

“Okay,” Arthur said loudly enough to be heard as he walked down the hallway towards them. “I know I said I’d give you the night to think, but I got halfway down the street and you weren’t beside me and that was wrong. It was wrong in every way, and now I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

Arthur had been talking directly to Merlin the entire time and he got all the way to Merlin’s door before he even realized that Elena and Gwaine were standing there as well. It really wasn’t until Elena gasped out his name that his focus faltered from Merlin.

“Elena,” Arthur said in surprise, “what the hell are you doing here?’

Elena opened her mouth to answer but Merlin beat her to it.

“That’s exactly what I said,” Merlin happily declared as he grabbed Arthur’s hand and pulled him through his now open door. “It’s all brilliant, Arthur, trust me. You’re going to love it.”

“Love what?” Arthur asked at the same time Elena asked, “What’s going on? What’s he going to love?”

Merlin pulled and yanked on Arthur until he got him sat down in a chair, then grabbed at both Elena and Gwaine until he’d manhandled them onto the settee.

“There. Perfect,” he said as he looked down at the three confused faces staring back up at him. “Intervention time.”

“Intervention?” Arthur asked. “Have you had a stroke, Merlin?”

“No, Arthur, I haven’t had a stroke in the seven minutes since you left me.”

Arthur made a face as he looked at Merlin. “Are you sure?”

“Never mind that.” Merlin waved away Arthur’s question. “There’s much more important things to talk about right now.”

“Yeah, I’d say so,” Gwaine said as he flopped back against the settee and made himself comfortable. “Have at it, crazyknickers.”

Merlin ignored Gwaine and stormed on ahead.

“So first off,” he began, “I told Arthur about the matchmaking.”

“You what?” Elena asked as she started to blush bright red. “Why did you that?”

“Because I told him about my magic and he needed to know.”

“What on earth for?” Elena squeaked as she pulled her feet up on the settee and buried her face in her knees. “Oh God, mortified here,” she mumbled.

“Don’t be embarrassed, it’s sweet. Misguided, but sweet,” Merlin said.

Elena groaned. “But you weren’t supposed to tell him. Why would he need to know?”

Merlin shrugged and looked over at Arthur. Elena was too busy being embarrassed to notice, but Gwaine watched as Merlin’s face changed entirely when he looked at Arthur; it grew soft--besotted, actually--and it made Gwaine smile.

“Because I love him,” Merlin said softly.

Arthur collapsed back into his chair and let out a short, surprised laugh. “You love me?”

Merlin rolled his eyes and grinned at him. “Like you didn’t know.”

“I suppose that’s true enough,” Arthur said fondly as he grinned right back at Merlin.

The look that passed between the two of them made Gwaine reach out for Elena’s hand just so he had a hold on the one thing that made him feel the way Arthur and Merlin looked just then. Content and wholly in love with one another.

Elena looked up in surprise, but she intertwined her fingers with Gwaine’s just the same.

“You love Arthur?” she asked Merlin.

“Fairly madly,” Merlin said, never taking his eyes off of Arthur.

“And I’m afraid I love him right back,” Arthur said. “Crazy as he is.”

“Oh my God, what’s going on?” Elena asked as she looked from Merlin to Arthur. “I can’t even -.”

Merlin looked over and interrupted Elena, “We’re setting things right.”

“But Arthur and I, we’re,” she stumbled over her words. “We’re figured out. We’re set right, aren’t we?”

Elena’s voice was small and uncertain, so much so that it made Arthur get up from his chair and sit on the other side of her.

“El,” he said softly as he tucked a stray curl behind her right ear. He looked down at her hands, clasped with Gwaine’s. “We aren’t really though, are we?”

“Arthur, I -. I thought we were.”

“We were,” Arthur agreed. “But a long time ago.”

“I know, but we had it all settled. We were going to try again.”

“I know, and I’m sorry. I love you, El, you know I do, but we were stupid to think we were okay with our decision. We shouldn’t have to try, we should just be.”

“Elena,” Merlin said. “I had everything planned to tell you that I couldn’t go through with it, that even if I did, it wouldn’t have worked. But then I saw you and Gwaine and the way he was looking at you and I knew your plans needed to be rewritten.”

When Elena didn’t respond right away Merlin added, “And I think you know it too.”

Elena looked over at Gwaine and saw exactly what it was she’d always wanted to see in Arthur but never truly did. Gwaine smiled at her the moment he realized she’d made her decision and she smiled back.

“Yeah, I think I do,” she agreed with Merlin but kept her eyes on Gwaine.

“We’re the stupidest people on the planet,” Merlin said happily. “Good thing we found each other, God knows no one else would’ve had our sorry arses.”

Elena snorted and Gwaine pulled her closer to his side.

“How the hell did we manage to write ourselves into a Spanish telenovela?” Gwaine asked. “I blame Merlin. When in doubt always blame Merlin.”

“Hey,” Merlin protested when Arthur and Elena laughed in agreement. “Low blow, mate.”

“It’s the truth.” Gwaine shrugged. “Remember the time you tried to turn a plate of veg into chocolate and you ended up shorting out the entire building’s electricity for the day?”

“I did nothing of the sort,” Merlin argued, but Gwaine gave him a look until he sighed and said, “Whatever. I wanted chocolate and all I had was cauliflower and aubergines.”

“And the obvious choice was to try to turn them into a Cadbury Milk Tray?”

“Shut up.”

“Isn’t he clever?” Arthur asked. “Is it any wonder I fell for him?”

Elena laughed at that and Arthur turned to smile at her.

“You’re okay, El, aren’t you?” Arthur asked. “I know this is all strange and a bit of a smack to the face, but everything makes sense now, doesn’t it?”

Elena reached out to touch Arthur’s cheek. “You look so happy, of course it makes sense.”

“But you’re okay?”

Elena looked over her shoulder at Gwaine. “I’m perfect.” She smiled as she stood up and reached back to pull Gwaine up with her. “And I’ll be even better once I get this one back to his flat and out of his clothes.”

Arthur laughed at the blush that covered Elena’s cheeks despite the boldness of her words, which made Gwaine cackle too.

“That’s my wicked girl,” he grinned happily.

“You guys,” Elena whined. “I’m trying to be sexy and you’re ruining it.”

“No we’re not, you’re doing a bang up job of it,” Gwaine said as he put his hand on her arse to push her towards the door. “Sexy as hell you are.”

Gwaine managed to get a snorting giggle out of Elena as they made their way out the door while Merlin waved at them and Arthur crossed his arms over his chest, smiling the entire time. Once the door closed behind them Merlin turned to Arthur and flung his arms around him.

“God, they’re stupid. Can you imagine being that stupid? Not even seeing what was right in front of them?” Merlin grinned at Arthur.

“No, I really can’t imagine being that stupid,” Arthur agreed with Merlin. “It’s appalling, really, what idiots people can be.”

“I know, I’m embarrassed for them,” Merlin said, his lips hovering just above Arthur’s.

“Extremely embarrassed,” Arthur nodded before closing the distance between their lips.

Merlin revelled in the kiss, the first one between them that was totally free from any hindrances, the first one that belonged wholly to them. He had his hand on Arthur’s chest and he could feel his heartbeat pattering away beneath his palm. It was a heady reminder of how much Arthur wanted him.

Arthur’s arms were around Merlin’s waist, one hand moving from the small of his back to his backside, the palm slipping over the slight curve and settling there as he pulled Merlin closer to him. Merlin laughed against Arthur’s lips and he could feel the smile spread across them.

“Mature, Merlin. Very mature,” Arthur teased him.

“Shut up, I’m happy,” Merlin said as he slid his hand against Arthur’s neck to hold him in place as he attacked him with small, nipping kisses along his jawline.

“And because I have my hand on your arse, admit it,” Arthur laughed breathlessly as he arched his neck to give Merlin more access.

“Uh-uh,” Merlin hummed against Arthur’s neck as he took his time to slowly drag his lips along the warm, stubbly skin until his mouth was back to hovering over Arthur’s lips. He looked at Arthur and their eyes locked. “I’m happy,” he repeated, “and we’re perfect. Somehow I managed to find you and your gropey hands and now I get to be groped by the man of my dreams forever. It’s like a fairytale.”

“Merlin,” Arthur said solemnly, “I promise to grope you until death do us part.”

Merlin raised his hands above his head in a celebratory gesture.

Arthur laughed as he gave Merlin’s arse a good squeeze and Merlin collapsed against him laughing happily, his face pressed into Arthur’s neck.

“Our grandchildren will find this deliriously romantic when we tell them about it,” Arthur smiled.

“Oh, without a doubt,” Merlin agreed.

Arthur snorted at that then leaned in to kiss Merlin. “Hopefully our grandkids will be as strange as you,” he said.

“If they’re lucky,” Merlin said as he grabbed Arthur by the shirt front to pull him with him to the bedroom. He tossed a look over his shoulder as he walked backwards and the door opened for them.

“Handy, that.” Arthur nodded with approval.

“You have no idea what I can do,” Merlin said as he backed them both into the bedroom and yanked Arthur in for a sloppy kiss.

Arthur stumbled against him but managed to find his balance when his hands settled on Merlin’s hips. Merlin gasped when Arthur’s fingers dug into him, gripping him so tightly Merlin felt his stomach drop with anticipation. He wanted Arthur desperate for him, scrambling at him, grabbing at him like he never wanted to let him go. Merlin wanted that more than anything because that’s what he felt for Arthur; he wanted to cling to him, twist himself into Arthur so it would be nearly impossible to pry them apart.

Merlin let go of the front of Arthur’s shirt so he could start fumbling with the buttons. After the first two he gave up and tried to tug it over Arthur’s head instead. He smiled at Arthur’s muffled laughter but once the shirt came off and Arthur's flushed face and tousled hair came into view, it made Merlin’s heart clench in his chest. He was so unbearably beautiful in that moment that Merlin wondered how he’d gotten so lucky.

He was about to tell Arthur so when Arthur leaned in and started nuzzling at Merlin’s jaw and earlobe as his hands slid up from Merlin’s hips to his sides. Arthur’s hands slipped beneath Merlin’s shirt and Merlin shivered at the touch of Arthur’s hands on his bare skin. Merlin moved his own hands over Arthur’s bare shoulders and back, the skin smooth and warm beneath his fingers.

“God, you’re gorgeous,” Merlin said as he turned into Arthur’s mouth, seeking it out for another kiss.

Arthur gently squeezed Merlin’s sides as he hummed in response, then tangled his fingers up in Merlin’s shirt to remove it. Merlin ducked and slid his arms out once Arthur got it over his head. Arthur’s hands moved to Merlin’s jeans and the lights buzzed and flickered around them.

Arthur laughed quietly. “Will it always be like this? Should I invest in a lightbulb factory?”

Merlin huffed out a laugh of his own. “Well aren’t you smug?”

Arthur’s fingers pulled down Merlin’s zip and his hand worked inside the front of his jeans, cupping him gasp, the bedside lamp burning out with a brilliant burst of light as the curtains at the open window flapped wildly in a sudden swirl of wind.

“I think I have reason to be smug,” Arthur said.

“I can control it,” Merlin said breathlessly. “But you make it impossible to focus.”

“Don’t.” Arthur pressed a kiss to Merlin’s lips. “I want to see what I do to you, how I make you feel.”

Merlin tangled his fingers up in Arthur’s hair and tugged at it as he kissed Arthur deeply, leaning into him and trying to steal his breath away.

“It’s not fair,” Merlin said, his lips wet against Arthur’s. “You see everything, my every response to you, but you’re hidden to me.”

Arthur pulled away from Merlin so he could look at him. “You’re lucky I am, if I wasn’t I’d bring the roof down every time you so much as looked at me. What you do to me, Merlin -.”

The way Arthur said it, like the weight of his desire for Merlin was nearly choking off his words, made Merlin ache in the pit of his stomach. He could only hold Arthur’s face in his hands and let his thumb drift across Arthur’s bottom lip.

“I love you,” was all he could say, but he hoped Arthur knew the power of those three words and that, to Merlin, they meant a lifetime of words to come, a promise of everything he could possibly offer up to him.

Arthur didn’t say anything in return, but he wrapped an arm around Merlin’s waist and lifted him just enough to move himself to the edge of his bed. Merlin reached behind him when he felt the mattress hit the back of his knees, and lowered himself onto his back as Arthur followed, covering him completely. Merlin’s cock ached as he shifted beneath Arthur and bent his knee until he could settle his foot against the mattress and use it to push his hips up into Arthur.

“Want you so much,” Arthur mumbled as his hands kept moving over Merlin.

Merlin reached for the buckle of Arthur’s belt so he could get it undone and his jeans pulled down and off of him. Arthur’s hands joined Merlin’s and helped him to get the jeans down his hips and off his legs as he kicked his shoes off. As Arthur pulled at his socks, Merlin started to shimmy out of his own jeans and tried kicking off his shoes. Arthur snorted with laughter when one of Merlin’s shoes flipped off and hit him on his hip.

“Graceful,” Arthur teased.

“Get used to it,” Merlin said.

“I plan to.”

They smiled goofily at one another when they realized what that implied. Merlin wanted to laugh--the idea of a hard and fast commitment, an absolute certainty, had never filled him with such giddiness before.

“This is all ridiculous, isn’t it?” Arthur asked, fondness clear in his voice as he held Merlin’s foot in his lap and tugged off a bright purple sock.

Merlin laid on his back and looked up at Arthur as he sat there and held Merlin’s now bare foot in his hands. Just two weeks ago he'd never even heard of Arthur Pendragon. He'd been alone and using all the magic he had inside him to make other people happy. But now he was lying nearly naked in bed with the one man capable of making his magic spark and flow inward until it filled him up--instead of leaving him for others' happiness like it had always done before. Yes, it was ridiculous, it was the most ridiculous thing in the world, and Merlin couldn’t have been happier about it.

“It’s wonderful, isn’t it?” he asked, his gaze fixed on Arthur so he could catch the flush of happiness he knew would pass over his face. Arthur didn’t say anything, he only nodded at him and smiled as he pulled on Merlin’s foot to drag him across the bed and closer to him.

Merlin laughed as he sat up and fixed his bent knees on either side of Arthur, pushing himself as close as he could get. Arthur’s hand traveled over Merlin’s ankle and up his calf until he got a good hold on the back of Merlin’s knee and dragged him up onto his lap. Merlin pushed himself off the bed to help Arthur along. Once he was firmly settled in Arthur’s lap, he wrapped his arms around Arthur’s neck and pressed himself against Arthur’s stomach. He was embarrassingly hard and even the warmth of Arthur’s skin seeping through the cotton of his boxers was enough to make him gasp.

“Swear to God,” Merlin moaned. “I’ll come the second you touch me again.”

Arthur’s breath hitched and he pushed his hips up. Merlin could feel him, just as hard as himself, and he wanted to get his hands on Arthur immediately, but Arthur seemed to have other ideas. He shifted them both until Merlin was on his back again, with his legs still wrapped around Arthur’s hips.

Arthur writhed against him, pushing at him and scrambling to gain purchase with his feet against the bed. Arthur’s breath came in fast, warm bursts against Merlin’s shoulder as Merlin mouthed at Arthur’s neck, too close to coming and too far gone to make his mouth find its way to Arthur’s lips.

A surge of heat spiraled up Merlin’s spine and he felt his entire body flash with energy as he came. He could hear the wind howling and his window rattling but nothing truly registered but the pure flood of pleasure coursing through him and the awareness of Arthur still rocking against him, breath heavy and skin hot to the touch beneath Merlin’s grasping fingers. He pressed kisses against Arthur’s jaw, the corner of his mouth, as he said his name and begged him to come. He could hardly bear the thought of waiting even another minute to hear just what Arthur sounded like when he came.

Arthur barely made any noise at all, his hips just shuddered to a stop and his arms clamped down around Merlin as he breathed into his neck--stuttering breaths that turned into gasps that made him sound like he was drowning. A last, desperate swallow of air and then the sound of Merlin’s name on his lips.

Merlin had to close his eyes against the pleasure of it, it was like he could feel everything Arthur felt and he was coming a second time right along with him. The rush was heady and nearly impossible for Merlin to contain within himself.

“God. _God_ ,” Arthur said once he was able.

Merlin turned his face into Arthur’s and laughed breathlessly, “And we didn’t even -.”

“No, we didn’t. Rather embarrassing, that,” Arthur laughed. “I feel like I’m fifteen and just got my first handjob.”

“Except I never even got my hand on you.”

Arthur snorted as he rolled off of Merlin and Merlin rolled to his side to follow him.

“What did I say? Embarrassing,” Arthur said.

“I feel like my mum will walk in on us at any minute,” Merlin laughed.

“Oh, playing naughty schoolboy, are we?” Arthur teased. “Tell me what your room looked like, was it covered in Smiths posters and notebooks full of teenage angst and poetry?”

“Shut it,” Merlin said as he smacked Arthur in the chest with the back of his hand.

Arthur curled in on himself. “Ow, dammit,” he laughed. “Or was it filled with comic books and action figures?”

Merlin sat up and pounded Arthur on his chest a couple of times with his fist for good measure.

“No, you twat, it was filled with Take That posters and my collection of hardcore pornography.”

“Eh,” Arthur shrugged as he rubbed at his chest where Merlin had hit him. “That was my next guess.”

“I suppose yours was filled with leather bound books, smoking jackets, and snifters of brandy.”

“You know me so well,” Arthur said as he turned into Merlin’s hip and kissed at the skin just above the waistband of his boxers.

Merlin laughed and ran his hand down Arthur’s arm, happy at the thought that while he didn’t yet know Arthur that well, he would. They would know each other inside and out and make a glorious mess of it all from time to time but would still want nothing more than to be even more tightly twisted together.

Unbreakable and certain.

~*~

Gwaine barely got Elena out Merlin’s door before he grabbed her and got her up into his arms. She laughed as she lifted her legs up and locked them around his hips.

“This is crazy. Tell me this isn’t the craziest thing ever, I dare you,” Elena said as Gwaine carried her the short distance to his door and shifted her weight slightly so he could reach for his doorknob.

“I’ve got you in my arms, ask me if I can even think beyond that,” Gwaine said as he got the door open and the both of them inside his flat. “Besides, I live across the hallway from a guy who can wiggle his fingers and make my bottle of beer float. Crazy is rather relative at this point.”

Elena grinned down at him as she took his face in her hands and kissed him just above the arch of his eyebrow. “Okay,” she said, “you win.”

Gwaine had carried Elena into his bedroom and was stopped next to his bed. “Oh no, hold on here a bit. I heard something about a dare before, can any of this daring business get you more naked?”

“More naked? How can I be more naked, I haven’t even started getting naked.”

“Well,” Gwaine said as he laid Elena out on her back on his bed, “you’re a bit naked here,” and kissed her behind her ear. He trailed his mouth along her neck to the hollow at the base of her throat. “A little bit here,” he added as he moved to take her wrist in his hand. He turned it over and kissed the inside of it.

Elena tangled her fingers up in Gwaine’s hair as he kept his mouth on her wrist. “Clever boy,” she whispered.

“I like to think so.”

Elena trailed her free hand over Gwaine’s side and to his back, slipped it under his shirt until it rested at the center of his back and urged him closer. Gwaine shifted until he covered Elena’s body with his own and was settled between her thighs.

“How did I even get here?” Elena asked in wonder. “I was so sure I knew what I wanted, and then there was you and everything I knew stopped making sense.”

“I’ve always loved confusing people.”

“Well you’ve done a splendid job of it.”

“And you don’t think you’ve done an equally brilliant job?” Gwaine asked, his hand cupping Elena’s face and his thumb resting against her full lower lip. “You’ve knocked me completely fucking senseless, El.”

“But was that really a difficult thing to do?” Elena asked and Gwaine laughed at the look of faux innocence she plastered on her face. “I doubt knocking you from sense to senseless is a long trip.”

“Oy, now,” Gwaine grumbled, and he grabbed at Elena’s waist as she started laughing and squirming beneath his touch.

The whole thing devolved into a tussling match that left them breathless and laughing, and when it was all over Gwaine could only look down at Elena’s flushed face and bright eyes and see everything he’d ever wanted laid out beneath him. Warm and soft and finally _his_.

“I never thought I’d have you like this,” Gwaine said, suddenly serious as he anchored his elbows on either side of Elena and held her head in his hands. “I wanted you so much, you don’t know how much, and I thought I couldn’t.” Gwaine stopped for a moment just to look at Elena, to lean down and kiss her, just a brush of lips. “And now you’re here.”

“And not going anywhere,” Elena whispered.

“I can’t even tell you what it was like watching you walk away from me. Dammit, El, don’t ever do that to me again.”

Elena shook her head. “I won’t.” And then it was like the emotions of the moment settled down on her and she made a noise caught somewhere between a laugh and a choked off sob. “I wouldn't know where to go without you anyway.”

Gwaine ran his bent knuckle along the underside and corner of Elena’s eye to wipe away the tear that had slipped out. “My beautiful girl,” he said, barely loud enough to be heard. Elena smiled up at him and kissed him to try to prove to him that he was nothing she had ever expected but was everything she’d ever wanted.

~*~

Merlin and Arthur had talked and kissed and touched, and fallen in and out of sleep the entire night long. Neither one could keep his hands off the other and it had made them both laugh to nearly the point of tears to think that their first time together had been nothing more than writhing and groping and messy kisses. Arthur had proclaimed it the least romantic beginnings ever as Merlin had laughed and kissed him and promised him it would be much better the next time.

Except the next time was a sloppy blowjob that led to an equally sloppy reciprocal blowjob that turned into more writhing and rubbing and groping. And everything just melted into touches that lingered until every inch of the other was felt, tasted, and taken in until it was nothing less than a known, familiar part of themselves.

It was like they wanted each other so much that they terrified one another. Merlin knew they’d be nothing less than brilliant together, he _knew_ it, but the thought of finally having Arthur nearly paralyzed him. He’d wanted and wanted and now that he could have his fill, could drink Arthur down, he wanted to prolong the sweet, fearful pleasure of it all.

But early the next morning Merlin woke up to the warmth of the sunlight on his bare leg, the touch of Arthur’s fingers on his naked hip, and Arthur’s lips already searching his own out and he knew he couldn’t last a minute longer without having Arthur open him up and sink down into him.

Neither one said a word to the other; Merlin ached with the quietness of it and the time Arthur spent on him, his touches everywhere, still not having had enough of him. They rocked together so slowly they barely moved at all and Merlin was certain he never wanted anything so much as to never move from beneath Arthur’s warmth, to never breathe another breath that wasn’t shared with Arthur because their mouths couldn’t be bothered to be parted long enough to take in their own air.

To never feel anything else except the way his magic had settled into a slow, warming flood that filled the room with lazy, peaceful tendrils of light. And to know his magic no longer needed to flair beyond its bounds because it was home right where it was, within himself and Arthur.

After, when Merlin had settled Arthur at his side, he’d simply taken Arthur’s arm and wrapped it around himself, curled into him as their legs and feet slotted into place, and whispered a quiet, _’yes’_ against Arthur’s neck.

The ‘yes’ that meant ‘finally’ and ‘this is right’ and ‘this is the beginning of everything.’ A wonderful, brilliant yes that Arthur understood and repeated back to him.

  
**~*~ Epilogue ~*~**  


“Make yourself useful and set the table,” Merlin called out to Arthur. “And make sure I get my orange mug, last time you gave it to Gwaine and the time before that to Elena.”

“By mistake.”

“So you say, but you always look far too pleased with yourself when I get arsed off.”

Arthur looked up from the book he was reading to smile at Merlin. “That’s because you’re so adorable when you’re arsed off.”

“Ha.” Merlin laughed. “Nice try. Set the table.”

Arthur sighed loudly as he got up from the settee and walked into the kitchen where Merlin was getting breakfast ready for the four of them. It had become tradition after they did it that first morning. The Morning After, they called it, when they’d been able to breathe around one another again because they were finally in the right place with the right person.

The first one had been awkward (very much fueled by Gwaine’s insistence for details from Merlin because, _’Hey! Merlin always gives me details, this is not gonna change,’_ ) and hilarious (helped by the fact that it was Elena who accidentally gave details and made Gwaine blush of all things).

They’d sat around Merlin’s cramped little kitchen table and looked at each other in silence for a good ten minutes before Merlin had blurted out that Arthur had given his orange mug to Gwaine and that was _his_ orange mug and now Gwaine was slobbering all over it. Gwaine had hidden his smile behind said orange mug as Arthur looked at Merlin for a second or two before bursting out in loud laughter. He’d leaned over and kissed Merlin’s cheek as he promised to never ever give his orange mug away for as long as he lived. Merlin’s eyes had softened and he looked so ridiculously besotted that Elena had snorted, _’Get a room,’_ and just like that the tension broke and it got easier and easier by degrees. It was still outrageously awkward and difficult to figure out how to act around one another, to learn how to tread through such new ground, but there was more progress than not, and they managed to take the embarrassments as they came. And to laugh about them afterward.

Every Sunday after that had become their time together for breakfast at Merlin’s flat, where they sat squashed around his kitchen table like an odd little incestuous, dysfunctional family. Gwaine and Elena had found a new flat together and were no longer right across the hall, so they had decided it was especially important to keep their Sunday breakfasts going. Much to Merlin’s amazement, and amusement, Arthur had moved into Merlin’s little flat instead of asking Merlin to move into Arthur’s much larger, much more grand Knightsbridge flat.

Merlin had asked Arthur why on earth he’d want to live at Merlin’s where he had to keep his clothes in assorted plastic crates, step over stacks of books and magazines in the lounge, and deal with a temperamental shower. Arthur had only shrugged and looked away to hide a shy smile as he said, _’it’s our home.’_ Merlin, who swore it wasn’t possible, had fallen even more in love with Arthur at that moment and couldn’t stop from flinging himself at him in a mad rush of limbs and sloppy kisses that made Arthur laugh and kiss him right back.

Merlin looked over his shoulder and rolled his eyes when Arthur made a huge production out of setting his orange mug next to his plate.

“Well done, Arthur, you’ve mastered a very simple task.”

Arthur gave Merlin’s side a pinch as he squeezed past him to get to the silverware drawer, and Merlin shuffled away in laughter.

“Smartarse,” Arthur said.

Merlin was about to give Arthur more grief but the door opened and Gwaine called out from the doorway.

“Food better be ready. I’m starving.”

“You know I live to serve you,” Merlin said to Gwaine once he and Elena came into the kitchen.

“When are you ever _not_ hungry, is what I want to know,” Elena said. “Because I know I’ve never seen it happen. Have you, Merlin?”

“Not that I’m aware of, no,” Merlin said. “He’s your problem now though.”

“Except on Sundays,” Gwaine said.

“He’s making me old before my time,” Elena said but she was smiling at Gwaine the entire time.

“Hey, you’re the one who agreed to marry me so you reap what you sow,” Gwaine said, smiling back at her like a fool.

“What?” Arthur nearly shouted at the same time Merlin actually yelled, “You’re getting married? Married!”

“What? No way, I’m not getting married to him,” Elena said.

“You said yes,” Gwaine said.

“I said yes to maybe _thinking_ about thinking about it.”

“You lie, Mrs. Greene.”

“No way am I taking your name, I _might_ hyphenate.”

“Fine,” Gwaine grinned. “We’re getting hyphenated.”

Elena grinned too. “Yeah, alright, we’re getting hyphenated.”

“You two are idiots,” Arthur said happily as he pulled Elena in for a hug. “Congratulations, El.”

“Hyphenated!” Merlin shouted as he yanked Gwaine into a hug.

“I think Merlin is going to wee himself soon.” Arthur laughed.

“Shut it, I’m happy for them,” Merlin said as he gave Arthur a shove before pulling Elena into a big bear hug.

“This calls for a toast,” Arthur said.

“We don’t even have any champagne,” Merlin said.

“Juice for now, get pissed later?” Arthur suggested.

“I can get behind that,” Gwaine said as he grabbed the orange juice and started pouring it so they could toast. He started laughing when he saw Merlin’s orange mug was next to his plate. Merlin looked over to see what he was laughing about.

“Arthur! You arsehole,” he said. “It’s not funny anymore. You only think it is.”

“No, it’s actually still pretty funny,” Elena said as she gave Merlin back his mug.

“He’s so cute when he’s in a strop, isn’t he?” Arthur asked.

“The cutest,” Elena agreed.

Merlin just sighed and leaned over to kiss Arthur. “You’re still not forgiven.”

Arthur smiled at him and pulled him over to his side as his hand settled on Merlin’s hip, and he raised a toast to Gwaine and Elena.

Merlin raised his mug and listened to Arthur’s toast, which was perfect, and made Elena tear up though she wouldn’t admit it. He slumped against Arthur and let him hold him close to his side and watched as Elena and Gwaine made googly eyes at one another. He’d have dearly loved to take the piss out of Gwaine for it but he looked so damn happy that it made Merlin just as happy in return. He couldn’t believe they’d managed to get where they were, especially considering the mess they’d worked themselves into, but every minute of the anxiety and heartbreaking chaos was worth it. It brought them to where they were, content and in love and an imperfect family. Merlin couldn’t think of anything better.

As they were getting the food to the table, and Gwaine and Elena were busy talking to one another, Arthur leaned into Merlin and brushed a kiss along his earlobe.

“I should make an honest man out of you someday too,” Arthur whispered in his ear.

Merlin smiled to himself and turned his head just enough to look at Arthur from the corner of his eye. “Are you asking?”

“Hm. Maybe.”

“Just as I always pictured it, over a pan of eggs and sausage,” Merlin teased.

Arthur pressed his hand into the dip at the small of Merlin’s back and he leaned back into the touch.

“I’ll ask you someday, when you least expect it.” The ghost of Arthur’s breath made Merlin shiver. “And it’ll be amazing, you’ll see.”

Merlin slipped an arm around Arthur’s waist and turned into him, kissed him with a slow brush of their lips. “Not unless I ask you first,” he whispered against Arthur’s mouth.

Arthur smiled and hummed in contented amusement.

“Race you.”

 

~ End

**Author's Note:**

> If you would like to leave a comment but prefer to do it on LJ you may do so at my masterpost [HERE](http://giselleslash.livejournal.com/387185.html).

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Podfic: Catch Me a Catch](https://archiveofourown.org/works/692480) by [striped_bowties](https://archiveofourown.org/users/striped_bowties/pseuds/striped_bowties)




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